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A FOUL TIP 



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A Foul Tip 



A Comedy Drama in Three Acts 



By 
CHARLES S. ALLEN 

Author of ^^The Teaser^' etc. 



Notice to Professionals 

This play is published for tlie free use of amateur players and or- 
ganizations only. Professional actors or companies producing it in 
any form or under any title, without the permission of the author, 
who may be addressed in care of the publishers, will be prosecuted to 
the full extent of the law. 



BOSTON 

WALTER H. BAKER & CO. 

1912 






A Foul Tip 



CHARACTERS 

Tim Purdy, postmaster, chief of police and storekeeper at West- 
vale. 
Hiram Rowell, the village expressman. 
Oliver Irving, tnanufacturer. 
Harold Irving, his son. 
Verne Gale, manager of the Westvale nine. 
Pollard, Irving s bookkeeper. 
Pete Adams, colored pitcher on the Westvale nine, 
Almira Purdy, Tim's wife. 
Mabel Remington, //-7'z«^'5 stenographer. 
Nellie Gale, Verne's sister. 

Members of the ball team, villagers, etc. 



If desired specialties may be introduced in the second act by the 
boys who are celebrating tiie victory of their ball team. 




Copyright, 191 2, by Walter H. Baker & Co. 

TMP92-008549 

/ 

©CLD :31174 



ABOUT THE CHARACTERS 

Timothy Purdy. — A big-hearted sympathetic man of the Josh 
Whitcomb type. Age about 70 ; smooth face, ruddy complexion ; 
thin wig, gray or partly bald ; ordinary country costume. Uncle 
Tim is a natural product of the country, kind and lovable. The 
part should not be burlesqued in any way. 

Hiram Rowell. — A lazy, slouchy, happy-go-lucky sort of fel- 
low, age 68 ; country costume of a rough type, gray wig, scraggly 
chin whiskers and moustache, old soft or straw hat; an old linen 
duster may be worn in some of the scenes if desired to add variety 
to the costumes. 

Oliver Irving.— Clean-cut, self-willed, cold-mannered busi- 
ness man, about 55 years old ; shghtly gray dress wig ; a mous- 
tache and neatly trimmed beard would go well with the part, the 
idea being to convey an impression of a successful business man 
who has always had his own way. , <* 

Harold Irving.— Smart, lively, stylishly dr(sssed, age 25. 
This part might well be given to one who will act as stage director, 
for while the demands of the part are not heavy, it should be taken 
by some one who is quick and alert to grasp all the strong situa- 
tions in the play and bring them out to the best possible advan- 
tage. 

Verne Gale. — Care should be taken to emphasize the frank 
and manly character of Verne, who is about 24. Though under 
suspicion he is not weak or effeminate, and careful study will make 
this part very effective. Ordinary summer costume. 

Pollard.— A polished, genteel appearing fellow, well dressed, 
but rather loud and sporty ; age about 28. Surly and cynical in 
speech to all but Irving. A loud red necktie should be worn in 
the second and third acts, 

Pete Adams.— This is a straight part and should net be bur- 
lesqued in the slightest degree. Adams is a manly young mulatto, 
age about 23; and the part should be played earnestly and seri- 
ously. Baseball costume and ordinary summer suit may be worn. 

Almira Purdy.— a type of the narrow-minded, gossipy and in- 
quisidve country woman. She speaks in a snappy, peppery sort 
of way, and is very much afraid that she will not see everything 
that is going on. 

Mabel Remington. — A bright, active girl, age 18 ; she is a girl 
of the athletic type, lively and unconventional, but true blue. If 
the part of Nellie Gale is taken by a brunette Mabel should be 
made up as a blonde. The part should be played lightly as a foil 
for the more serious part of Nellie Gale. 



I 

4 NOTES 

Nellie Gale. — A character of the emotional type, age 19. 
The hnes should be spoken seriously and the situations should be 
carefully studied to get the best possible effects from several very 
strong scenes. Costumes, simple summer gowns. 

NOTES 

Especial care should be given to rehearsing the scenes in which 
the baseball team appears ; there should be no hesitation in dia- 
logue or action, and both should go with snap and vim to get the 
best effect. 

The phonograph records called for are as follows : "Mocking 
Bird," Xylophone solo, Edison Amberol record No. 564. " Moon- 
light on the Lake," Edison Amberol record No, 578. " Sweetest 
Story Ever Told," Edison Amberol record, No. 786. 

The last record plays the selection through twice, and the best 
effect will be obtained at the opening of the third act, to have 
Nellie enter between the first and second part, as noted in the text. 

The platform only of Purdy's store need be shown in the stage 
setting. This, may extend along the left side of stage, leaving 
sufficient roonijliii-^dr for 'si^d entrance. This arrangement leaves 
the stage pradtlcallf clear with the exception of the bench and 
tree at right. 

Villagers may be introduced in some of the scenes if desired, 
particularly if specialties are put on. 

PROPERTIES 

Act I. — Tinware, garden tools, etc., for store platform. Watch 
for Hiram. Pitcher's glove and bat for Adams. Telephone bell. 
Roll of bills for Harold. Bell for Irving to give Tim. Stamps for 
Almira to give Mabel. Mail bag for Hiram. Bundle of bats for 
Hiram. Bill for Hiram to give Almira. Pocketbook for Tim, 

Act II. — Mail bag for Hiram. Pocketbook for Pollard to drop. 
Record: Xylophone solo, " Mocking Bird," with variations. Any 
xylophone solo will do. but this is an extra good one. Broom for 
Almira. Record: "Moonlight on the Lake," or any good loud 
selection. Thunder and lightning effects. Rubber coat for Tim. 
Shawls and waterproofs for Nell and Mabel. 

Act III.— Letter for Nell. Edison Amberol record : '* Sweetest 
Story Ever Told," Venetian Trio. A beautifully played record. 
Paper for Hiram, Magazine for Almira, Badge for Tim. Watch 
for the boys to give Nell. Pocketbook for Pollard. Plank or rail 
to carry Pollard on. Engine whistle. 



A Foul Tip 



ACT I 

SCENE. — Exterior of Piirdfs store left of stage ; covered plat- 
form common to country stores ; tinware, garden tools, etc.f 
displayed. Village scene for back drop. Rustic or foliage 
wings for right of stage which is supposed to be adjacent to the 
village common and ball field. Tree and bench R . , well down 
front. Lamp-post or reflector lamp at upstage corner of 
store platform. Time, Saturday forenoon in June. 

(At rise of curtain Tim Purdy is discovered sitting on store 
platform reading paper ; ball players are heard outside at 
practice. Ball thrown in lands among tinware and 
makes a big racket, l^m jumps up, grabs the ball, and 
throivs it out with considerable effort.) 

Tim. Be keerful, boys ; you'll break some glass fust thing 
ye know. (^ Phone rings; Tim enters store to answer.) 
Hello. Yes. What? Two pounds be enough ? All right. — 
No, I ain't got any fly paper ; got some good sandpaper, though. 
What? No, s' pose not. Good-bye. 

(Tim in door as Oliver Irving enters.) 

Irv. {entering r.). Good -morning, Mr. Purdy. 

Tim. Why, how d'ye do, Mr. Irving? What can I do for 
you this morning? {Walks down c, meets Irv.) 

Irv. They tell me that you are the chief of police in this 
village. 

(Irv., r. c. Tim, l. c.) 

Tim. Yes, sir, I am. In fact I'm the whole department 
jest now. The other man's gone on his vacation. 

Irv. Have you ever done any detective work, Mr. Purdy ? 

5 



b A FOUL TIP 

Tim. Wal, once in a while I pull up an automobile cboffer 
for overspeedin' jest to keep my hand in ; but most of them get 
away. 

Irv. I wasn't aware that anything down here ever went fast 
enough to get away. 

Tim. So you think this is a slow town, do ye, Mr. Irving? 

Irv. It's quiet, very quiet. 

Tim. Wal, s'pose it does seem so to you ; but when you 
kinder git into society, so to speak, you'll find it quite lively 
here, I reckon. 

Irv. Possibly. 

Tim. Yes, indeed, specially in winter. Why, there ain't 
hardly a week passes that there ain't a whist party or a church 
supper or spellin' bee or something. I tell ye, it's quite a social 
whirl here in the winter time. 

Irv. I am glad to know that, Mr. Purdy, but just now I 
have something else on ray mind. 

Tim. Is that so ? What is it ? 

Irv. (^glancing around cautiously). Are you sure we won't 
be overheard ? 

Tim {looking off l., then in store, coming down). All right, 
fire away, Mr. Irving — there's no one around. Almira, she 
can't hear, for she's busy with the mail. 

(Tim, r. c. Irv., l. c.) 

Irv. Some money was stolen from my safe last night. 

Tim. Sho ! You don't say ! How much ? 

Irv. About one hundred dollars. 

Tim. Wal, I vum ! Ain't this a pretty how-de-do, an' half 
the police force on its vacation. Ever miss any before ? 

Irv. Yes, several times. 

Tim. Much ? 

Irv. No ; that is, only small amounts at a time, but quite 
a sum in the aggregate. 

Tim. Who's your bookkeeper? 

Irv. Mr. Pollard. 

Tim. I s'pose he knows the combination to your safe? 

Irv. Yes, naturally. 

Tim. Anybody else ? 

Irv. Yes. 

Tim. Who? 

Irv. Well, there's my son, Harold ; Miss Remington, my 
stenographer, and young Gale. 



A FOUL TIP 7 

Tim. Gale ? You mean Verne Gale, do ye ? 

Irv. Yes ; he worked for me a short time. 

Tim. Left when he decided to study law, didn't he ? 

Irv. Yes. 

Tim. Fine lad, Verne is, mighty likely boy ! 

Irv. Then you're a friend of his ? 

Tim. Wal, I should say yes. Why, I've known Verne ever 
since he was knee high to a grasshopper. Knew his father an' 
mother afore him. Fine family right through. 

Irv. His parents are not living? 

Tim. No, only Verne and Nell left. You know her, 
don't ye? 

Irv. No. 

Tim. Guess your son does. 

Irv. {coolly). Possibly. 

Tim. Yes \ don't take young folks long to get acquainted. 
Powerful nice girl, Nellie Gale is; smart as a whip, an' a good 
housekeeper, too. But this ain't business. How about your 
man Pollard, is he all right ? 

Irv. I have no cause to think otherwise. 

Tim. Do you suspect any one ? 

Irv. {Iiesiiatingly). Well — no — that is, I can't say that I 
do exactly. 

Tim. No clues nor nothin' to work on ? 

Irv. No clues, but some of the missing bills were marked — 
that may help some. 

Tim. Marked ? 

Irv. Yes ; the thefts have been so frequent of late that it 
occurred to me to mark those particular bills, as they were new, 
just from the bank. 

Tim. Good idee ! How'd you mark 'em ? 

Irv. With a small cross in black ink on the back of the 
bills in the upper left hand corner. 

Tim. All small bills? 

Irv. The marked bills were fives and tens. I thought some 
of them might turn up at your store. 

Tim. Mebbe so, but I doubt it. 

Irv. Well, keep your eyes open, Mr. Purdy. I'm in a 
hurry now ; will see you later. 

Tim. All right, any time. 

Irv. {starting off r., pans in s[). If you happen to run across 
any of the bills call me up, will you? 

Tim. Yes, if I do. \^Exit Irv., r. 



8 A FOUL TIP 

Nellie Gale {outside l.). Do you know where Verne is, 
Mr. Rowell ? 

Hiram Rowell {outside). No ; ain't seen him to-day. 

Tim. I'd Hke to know who Irving suspects. I'll bet a cent 
he has somebody in his mind. {Sits by store doormeditating.) 

Enter Nel., l. 

Nel. Oh, Uncle Tim, is Verne here? (l. c.) 

Tim. No, dear; wouldn't be s'prised if he's out on the ball 

grounds. 

Nel. If you see him will you tell him that Harold Irving is 

looKing for him, please ? 

(^Crosses to R. ; stands by seat under tree.) 

Tim. Harold Irving? {Rises and comes down L. c.) 

Nel. Yes ; he called at the house. 

Tim. Did he ? To see Verne ? 

Nel. Yes ; Hal's going away quite unexpectedly. 

Tim. Now, 'tain't possible that he jest kinder called round 
on the side, so ter speak, to see you, is it ? 

Nel. Perhaps so; and why not, Uncle Tim? We are 
very good friends. 

Tim. I don't see any earthly reason why not, Nell. I only 
said that jest for fun. Harold Irving's a likely boy, I guess — 
better' n the average, an' he shows good sense in choosin' his 
friends, takin' you an' Verne as samples, for instance. 

Nel. It's nice of you to say that; I wish his father thought 
so, too. {Sits 071 bench.) 

Tim. His father ! What do you mean, Nell ? Now tell 
rae what's gone wrong. 

Nel. I'm unhappy, Uncle Tim, very unhappy this morning. 

Tim {with solicitude). Now that's too bad, Nell, too bad ! 
What's the trouble, kinder upset because Hal is goin' away? 

{Stands at Nel.'s left.) 

Nel. Yes, but more because his father so bitterly opposes 
our friendship. That's why he's sending Hal away. Mr. Irv- 
ing even objects to Hal's intimacy with Verne. Sit down, 
Uncle Tim. 

(Tim sits at Nel.'s left.) 

Tim. What's he got agin you an' Verne, I'd like to know ? 



A FOUL TIP 9 

Nel. You must remember, Uncle Tim, that rich men have 
ambitious plans for their sons; Mr. Irving is no exception. He 
wants Hal to choose his friends from his own circle. 

Tim. Thunderation ! Irving ain't so mighty rich, I guess. 
Do you mean to tell me that he thinks you an' Verne ain't 
good enough company for his son ? 

Nel. {earnestly). I mean, Uncle Tim, that Mr. Irving has 
plans of his own for Hal's future — plans in which I have no 
place. I am not the kind of a girl he wants his son to marry. 

Tim. Marry ! Why, Nell, I guess I don't quite under- 
stand — I 

Nel. {interrupting). I'm afraid you don't, Uncle Tim. 
You must remember that I'm no longer a child, though I hope 
that to you I will always be your little Nell ; the same little 
girl you took to your heart, when with her brother, she was left 
fatherless and motherless — almost homeless. — Oh, you've been 
so good to me, so good to Verne. I'll never forget it, never; 
but I'm older than most girls of my years, Uncle Tim ; sorrow 
has made me so. I'm a woman now, facing a woman's future. 

Tim. Bless me, so you are, Nell, so you are; but I can 
scarcely realize it. So you think you've sorter outgrown my 
guardianship, do ye? 

Nel. Oh, no, not that, Uncle Tim ; no one can ever take 
your place. 

Tim {with feeling). I'm glad to hear ye say that, Nell, 
mighty glad, for you're like an own daughter to me, almost, 
an' I'd hate awfully to have ye sorter grow away from me, like ; 
I'd feel somehow as if I'd kinder lost my job, so ter speak, if I 
didn't have you an' Verne to look after. 

Nel. I shall always come to you for help and advice. Uncle 
Tim, so you need have no fear of losing your job. It sounds 
funny to hear you speak of it like that. Now what ought I to 
do about Hal ? 

Tim. If I's you I'd let the matter drift for a spell. Don't 
fret ! You ain't so old but what you can afford to wait a while 
an' let things take their course. 

Nel. But what if Hal ? 

Tim {interrupti?ig). Don't worry about Hal. If he's the 
boy I think he is he's capable of managin' his own love affairs 
an' it's dollars to doughnuts if he don't bring his father to the 
same way of thinkin'. 

Nel. Then you do not think it's wrong for me to ? 

(Hiram heard whistling outside.') Oh, some one's coming. 



10 A FOUL TIP 

Tim. Sounds like Hiram Rowell's whistle. 
(^Rises ; goes up c. a little.') 

Nel. I must go, Uncle Tim. If you see Verne you won't 
forget to tell him about Hal, will you ? 

Tim. I'll remember, Nell. Now cheer up. When the sun 
comes out things'U look brighter all 'round. (iS";*:// Nel., r. 
Enter Hiram, l.) Hello, Hiram ! Goin' to the game this af- 
ternoon ? {Co?nes down R. c.) 

Hiram. Guess not; looks like rain, wind's right. 

{Looks off R. ; conies down l. c. ) 

Tim. You can't tell nothin' by the church weather-vane, 
Hi, 'tain't workin'. 

Hiram. Ain't it? 

Tim. No; I cal'late the sun'll be out by noon. 

Hiram. It's got to clear up pretty quick then. It s a quar- 
ter past ten now. {Looks at old-fashioned silver watch.) 

Tim. Wal, I'm lookin' for a mighty hot game if they play. 

Hiram. I ain't so sure 'bout that. Ferd Pike went all to 
pieces in the game last Saturday. Verne Gale had to take him 
out in the third innin'. 

Tim. What of it ? We got the game jest the same, didn't 
we? Verne's something of a pitcher himself. 

Hiram. He ain't so bad. 

Tim. Guess he ain't. It's goin' some to strike out twelve 
men, some of 'em the hardest hitters on the Brewster team. 

Hiram. Gale can't do that stunt every day, Tim. 

Tim. That's so, Hiram. That's why he's signed Pete 
Adams. 

Hiram. What ! Adams the nigger watchman up to the 
shoe factory ? 

Tim. That's the boy ! He pitched a great game Wednes- 
day. 

Hiram. What's Gale want a nigger pitcher for ? 

Tim. You don't object to Adams on account of his color, 
do ye. Hi ? I didn't s'pose you had it in ye to be so narrer. 

Hiram. I ain't narrer. Don't you insinuate for a minute 
that I be 

Tim. Insinuate I Anybody might know you've been 



A FOUL TIP II 

boardin' the schoolmarm. I didn't insinuate — 1 jest twitted 
ye of bein' what 1 said ye was. 

Hiram. Wal, anyway, when it comes to the national game, 
it seems as if we might find white fellers enough to play it. 

Tim. Now you jest listen to me a minute, Hi Rowell, an' 
listen hard. Pete Adams' grandfather took part in a national 
game way back in '6i an' he was with a winnin' team too; 
an* I remember that jest about that same time you was chasin' 
around for a substitute. There's one for ye, Hi, right over the 
plate. 

Hiram. By Judas, Tim Purdy, I ain't goin' to take no 
more sass from you if you be one-half the police force of this 
town. You shut up ! If you don't I'll put a quietus on to ye. 

Tim. 'Twouldn't hold in law, Hi. 'Tain't legal. Thun- 
der, if you board the teacher much longer you'll be spittin' 
dictionaries next thing. 

Hiram. Wal, p'raps I will an' p'raps I won't, but so far's 
this nigger pitcher's concerned 

Tim {interrupting quickly). So far's Pete Adams's con- 
cerned you keep your mouth shet or there'll be a substitute 
expressman in Westvale for a few days. 

(Almira Purdy at store door,') 

Almira. Say ! What are you kids scrappin' about ? Come 
along in here, Tim, and git the mail ready. 
Tim {meekly), I'm comin', Almiry. 

{Starts up L. ; Hiram crosses to R.) 

Almira {coming down c). An' you, Hiram Rowell, you'd 
better say nothin' and saw wood. Nancy told me not more'n 
an hour ago that you hadn't enough worked up to bake the 
beans with. 

Hiram. Wal, guess we can git along without the beans. 
Can't expect me to run the express business an' tend to house- 
hold duties, too, kin ye ? 

Almira. I guess 'tis expectin' most too much oi you, 

Hiram. But, Almiry 

Almira. Oh, you needn't try to palaver 'round me. Nice 
kind of a man you be — set around an' let your wife slave from 
mornin' till night. She never gits out to go nowheres, not even 
to the sewing circle. 



12 A FOUL TIP 

Hiram. Wal, I 

Positions : 

Almira, c. 
Hiram, r. Tim, l. 

Almira. Shut up ! Don't talk back to me. I don't allow 
my own husband to do that. Ef I's Nancy, I'd get a divorce, 
that's what I'd do. 

Hiram. By chowder, I guess I'd want ye to, Almiry. What 
in thunder are you talkin' about, anyway? 

Tim. She's talkin' about all the time, as usual. 

Almira. That's enough from you, Tim Purdy. Thought I 
told you to git the mail ready. 

Hiram. Ef my axe was as sharp as your tongue, Almiry, 
I'd have my whole wood-pile worked up in half an hour. 

Almira. You ain't got more'n half a cord anyway. (^ Phone 
rings.) Come along, Tim. \_Exit Almira, in store. 

(^Cheering outside. ^^ Adams, Adams, rah, rah, rah! He^ s 
all right I Who's all right ? A-d-a-m-s— Tiger /") 

Tim. There, now, Hi, don't that sound's ef the new pitch- 
er's makin' good ? 

£nter Verne Gale and Pete Adams, r. ; Pete has on 
uniform, pitcher's glove and bat in hands. 

Gale. We're going after them to-day, all right, Uncle 
Tim. Ah, Mr. Rowell, you're just the man I want to see. 

Hiram. Wal, 'twon't cost ye nothin'. 

Gale. I'm not so sure about that. I'm expecting a bun- 
dle of bats to-day. Did they come this morning ? 

Hiram. Not on the first train ; the express hain't got in 
yet. 

Positions : 
Adams. Gale. 

Hiram. Tim. 

Gale. If they come will you leave them here, please? 
Hiram. Yes, when I bring up the mail. 



A FOUL TIP 13 

Gale. Good ! What do you think of my new pitcher, 
Uncle Tim ? 

Tim. He's all right. (^To Pete.) I'm mighty glad you're 
on the team, Adams. I hope you'll make good. 

Pete {who is gentlemanly and reserved^. Thanks, Mr. 
Purdy. I'll do my best. 

Tim. That's all angels can do. You'll win out all right. 

Hiram. Wal, guess I'll go an' hitch up. \^Exit. 

Tim. Oh, Verne, I most forgot something. Harold Irving's 
lookin' for you. Nell wanted me to tell ye 

Gale. All right, Uncle Tim, I'll hunt him up. 

Almira {iit door). Tim, are you comin' ? 

Tim. In jest a minute, Almiry ; don't hurry me so. 

Almira. Hurry you ! Man alive ! I couldn't hurry you ; 
you move slower than a bug on a tarred stick. Now mosey 
along and git the mail ready. 

Tim. You've heard the proclamation, boys. Guess p'raps 
I'd better go. Won't you wait ? I won't be long. 

Gale. No, thanks ; not this morning, Uncle Tim. 

Tim. Wal, stop in any time ; you too, Adams \ glad to have 
ye. 

Pete. Thank you, Mr. Purdy. (^^// Tim.) I like that 
man, Verne ; is he a friend of yours? 

Gale. One of the best a fellow ever had, Adams. 

Pete. You're in luck. {Looks off r.) Here's Harold 
Irving. I'll go along now ; back soon, Verne. [Exit^ l. 

Enter Harold Irving, r. 

Harold, Great luck ! You're just the chap I'm looking 
for. 

Gale. What's up? 

Harold. Everything ! I'm going away on the 11 : 10. 

Gale. Going away ! Where ? 

Harold. Western trip, some business of Dad's. 

Positions : 
Harold, r. c. Gale, l. c. 

Gale. Sudden, isn't it? 

Harold. Rather; never knew a thing about it till last 

night. Hate awfully to go just now because 

Gale. Because ? 



14 A FOUL TIP 

Harold. Well, because — say, Verne, will you do me a 
favor ? 

Gale. You don't need to ask ; what is it ? 

Harold. Now it's just this way, Verne. Going away so 
unexpectedly has upset all my plans. Listen ! Next week 
Thursday will be your sister's birthday — and 

Gale. By Jove, so it will. Say, Hal, since when have you 
become so familiar with the chronology of our family? 

Harold. Oh, that's all right. Chaff me if you like. I 
don't mind. I was about to say that I intended to give Nellie 
a watch. 

Gale. And now she'll miss the //w^ of her life ; but it's 
nice of you, Hal, just the same. 

Harold. No, she shall have the watch even if I'm not 
here to give it to her. 

Gale. Well, what do you want me to do? Where do I fit 
in? 

Harold. Don't be in such a hurry ; just give me time. 

Gale. Oh, I thought you had time to give away. 

Enter Pete, l. back^ remains unseen. 

Harold. Wretched pun, Verne, cut it ! Here, take this 
money. {Hands roll of bills.') I want you to get the watch 
for Nellie. I'd like one of those dainty thin affairs, with a 
plain case. 

Gale. It's a plain case all right. 

Harold. Shut up ! 

Gale. Then you don't want an open face? 

Harold. I don't want yours open when I'm trying to talk. 

Gale. All right, spiel away. 

Harold. Have her initials engraved on the case. 

Gale. Then this is an initial proceeding. I thought from 
what you've said that it had been going on for some time. 

Harold. Oh, for the love of Mike, do be serious. Get a 
chain or a chatelaine to go with it. 

Gale. With the love of Mike ? 

Harold. No, no, the watch. Confound you ! Have it 
delivered on Nell's birthday without a word of explanation. 
It'll keep her guessing. 

Gale. But what if she asks me about it ? What will I do ? 

Harold. Well, can't you put up some kind of a bluff, just 
to help nie out? 

Gai.Il. Vcs, 1 suppose so, but 



A FOUL TIP 15 

Harold. All right, then no buts. Keep the whole business 
a profound secret. You promise ? 

Gale. Yes. 

Harold. And, Verne? 

Gale. Well ? . ^ , . n ^ 

Harold Twenty dollars of the money is for the ball team. 
Put it where it'll do the most good. [Exit Pete quietly R. 

Gale Hal, you're a brick. Forgive me for jollying you. 

Harold. Thai's all right, old boy, but remember, on your 
honor, not a word to any one. 

Gale. On my honor, Hal, and that goes. 

Harold. I know it. {Looks at watch.) My, how time 
flies when you haven't any to spare. 

Gale. Yes, same way with money. 

Harold. I say, Verne, take me up to the house in 
Duckey's car, will you ? I didn't realize it was so late. 

Gale. Sure thing, come on ! 

{As they start off hurriedly back, Mab. enters R.) 

Mab. Where's the fire, Verne? I haven't heard any 
alarm. 

(Mab., r. Hal., c. Gale, l.) 

Gale. No fire ; just going to see Hal off. Of course you'll 
go to the game ? 

Mab. Yes, if it doesn't rain. 

Gale. It won't; the sun's most out now. It 11 be a hot 
one— the game, I mean. 

Enter Hiram, r. Goes in store, gets mail-bag and comes to 
store door. 

Harold. Keep an eye on Verne while I'm away, Mabel. 
Mab. Leave it to me, Mr. Irving. I wish you a pleasant 

^^hTIold. Thanks, (r^ Gale.) Come, hurry up. 

Gale. Coming along, Hiram ? , i, 1.^ 

Hiram. Yes, but I've got to drive over to the shoe shop 

'gaie Perhaps I'll see you at the depot, then. Anyway, 
keep an eye out for those bats. We'll need them this after- 
noons 



l6 A FOUL IIP 

(^Exit Harold and Gale. Aiiio horn outside, etc. Mab. 
crosses to l.) 

Almira [if /side). Tim ! Tim ! 

Hiram. Tim ain't here, Almiry. (Comes down r. c. To 
Mab.) Almiry's sorter wound up this mornin'. Guess if you 
don't mind I'll move along. 

Mab. You're quite excusable, Mr. Rovvell. 

Almira {inside). Tim ! Tim ! I declare, Tim's so crazy 
over baseball that I can't keep track of him at all. (Mab. 
crosses to bench ; stands. Almira enters via store door.) Oh, 
good-morning, Miss Remington. Ain't seen Tim, hev ye? 

Mab. No, Mrs. Purdy. I'd like fifty two- cent stamps. 

Almira. Use a lot of stamps, don't ye ? 

Mab. Yes, a great many. 

Almira. You're workin' up to the shoe fact'ry, ain't ye, 
Miss Remington ? 

Mab. Yes. 

Almira. Running a machine ? 

Mab. Yes, a typewriter. 

Almira. Then you don't really work ? 

Mab. Work ? Certainly I do, Mrs. Purdy ! Why do you 
ask such a question ? 

(Mkb., at bench. Almira, c.) 

Almira. Oh, I dunno. I sorter had an idee that about all 
typewriters had to do was to set around and polish their finger 
nails. 

Mab. ( provoked). You are quite mistaken, Mrs. Purdy. 

Almira. Oh, no offense, Miss Remington. Mr. Irving's a 
nice sort of a man to work for, ain't he? 

Mab. Well, any one who likes a man of his temperament 
would be apt to like Mr. Irving very much. 

Almira {cojifused). Why — I — well, yes, that's what I 
thought. His son's sorter shinin' up to Nellie Gale, isn't he? 

Mab. Is he? 

Almira. Yes, so they say. Pretty wild sort of a chap, I 
gut:ss, from what I hear. 

Mab. What people hear is not always correct, Mrs. Purdy. 
(Aside.) She's a human interrogation point. I must get away 
somehow. (Aloud.) Will you please get my stamps? I'm 
in a hurry. 



A FOUL TIP 17 

Enter Pollard, r. Almira eyes him sharply. 

Almira. Come right in, Miss Remington; I'll get your 
stamps in a jiffy. 

(^Exit Almira, in store. Mab. starts to follow.') 

Pol. One moment, Mabel. 

(Mab. comes down L. c.) 

Mab. Well, what is it ? 

PoL. I'd like to take you to the game this afternoon. 

Mab. Thanks. I'm otherwise engaged. 

Pol. What's the matter with you lately, Mabel ? 

Mab. Nothing; why? 

Pol. You're not very chummy, — quite frosty, in fact. 

Mab. I have no time to be chummy, Mr. Pollard. 

Pol. You find time enough to give to Verne Gale. 

Mab. You have no right to speak like that. How dare 
you ? 

Pol. You can't deny it. Wasn't he in our counting-room 
last night ? 

Mab. Yes. 

Pol. And didn't he walk home with you ? 

Mab. What if he did ? Did it ever occur to you, Mr. 
Pollard, that you could save yourself a great deal of worry by 
minding your own business ? 

Pol. Now, don't get angry, Mabel; it isn't becoming. So 
you won't go to the game? 

Mab. Yes, but not with you. 

Pol. Oh, I see ! Well, that's all right. Excuse me for 
suggesting it. 

Almira {outside). Here's your stamps. Miss Remington. 

[Exit Mab., in store. 

Pol. Verne Gale is getting too popular altogether. ( Crosses 
to L. c. Enter Pete, r.) See here, Adams, I've got a bone 
to pick with you. 

Pete. All right ; pick away. 

Pol. After the talk I had with you I didn't expect to see 
the Westvales win their last game. You played like a fiend. 

Pete. And why not ? That's what I am paid for. 

Pol. Isn't my money as good as Gale's? 

Pete. Not when you try to use it dishonestly. 

Pol. Hold on, Adams ; you're going too far. 



1 8 A FOUL TIP 

Pete. No, Mr. Pollard, you have gone too far. You tried 
to bribe me to throw the game. You are mistaken in your 
man. 

Pol. Man ! You ! {Laughs couiemptuously.) Irving's 
nigger watchman. 

Pete. You haven't anything on me, even if I am colored. 
I fancy the Westvale boys wouldn't consider it exactly manly 
in you if they knew about the dirty job you tried to put up on 
them. 

Pol. If you breathe a word Til make it so warm for you 
that you can't stay in Westvale. 

Pete. You can't scare me, Mr. Pollard. As to telling, it's 
up to you if you want this matter kept quiet. 

Pol. Oh, I see ! A bit of blackmail. Fine ! Fine ! You 
want me to buy your silence ? 

Pete. No. I have nothing to sell that your money could 
buy. I want nothing to do with you or your kind. If you 
attempt any more of your dirty work you'll be the one to leave 
town, and I guess there'll be quite a delegation to see you off. 

Pol. Shut up, you cur, or I'll cram your words down your 
throat. 

Pete. You're mistaken again. I'm stronger than you. 
You wouldn't enjoy receiving a black eye from a "nigger," 
would you ? 

Pol. (taking off coat). Put up your hands. 

Pete. I hate to do it, but if you insist. 

{Removes coat. A little sparring may be introduced at dis- 
cretion of stage manager.') 

Enter Mab., from store. 

Mab. What does this mean ? 

Pete. Don't be alarmed. Miss Mabel. I'm giving Mr. 
Pollard a few points in the art of self-defense. (To Pol.) 
Got enough ? 

(Pete, r. Mab., c. Pol., l.) 

Pol. (surlily). Yes; I will call it off for the present. 
Pete (cheerfully). All right. Give you another go any 
time you say. 

(Puts on coat and exits r., whistling. Pol, crosses and 
takes coat from seat. Puts it on. ) 



A FOUL TIP 19 

Mab. Were you having trouble with Adams, Mr. Pol- 
lard ? {^Comes down c.) 

Pol. You heard what he said, didn't you ? 

Mab. Yes, but I thought you were quarreling when I came 
in. 

Pol. Nothing serious, I assure you. 

Mab. It looked for a minute as if you were going to get 
yours, as the boys say. By the way, Mr. Pollard, great game 
Wednesday, wasn't it ? 

Pol. Rather exciting, yes. {Annoyed.) 

Mab. Verne Gale didn't get his that time, did he ? 

Pol. {aside). Confound her impudence ! {Aloud.) No, 
baseball is a very uncertain game. 

(Pol., r. c. Mab., l. c.) 

Mab. So it is. Yet you seem very confident. Why were 
you so sure the Westvales would lose ? 

Pol. {aside). She's mighty inquisitive. {Aloud.) Well, 
the Brewsters have a better nine, but luck was with Gale's 
team all the time. 

Mab. It wasn't luck when Verne made that dandy catch 
way out by the left-field fence, was it ? 

Pol. Sure thing. He couldn't do that once in a hundred 
years. 

Mab. Well, how about that three-bagger he made in the 
ninth, that brought in two runs and won the game? That 
wasn't luck, I don't think. My, but didn't they cheer Verne, 
though ! 

Pol. Yes, some folks seem to think Gale is the whole team. 

Mab. An opinion that evidendy you do not share. 

Pol. My opinion of Verne Gale counts for but little with 
you ; a man with half an eye can see that. 

Mab. I'm glad your eyesight is good, Mr. Pollard. It 
may save you some embarrassment in the future. 

Pol. Cut out the sarcasm, Mabel. As for the future — 
well, wait and see. 

Mab. Very sensible advice, Mr. Pollard, since the future 
presents no other alternative. {Tantalizitigly .) Good-morn- 
ing, Mr. Pollard. {^Exit, R. 

Pol. It's Gale, Gale, all the time ! Nothing to it but 
Verne Gale. I'd like to kick up a tempest that would blow 
him to kingdom come. {Crosses to l.) 



20 A FOUL TIP 

Enter kiMi^k^ from store ; stands ifi door. Enter Irv., r. 

Irv. Oh, Pollard, you here? Mrs. Purdy, I wish to speak 
to your husband. 

Almira. Yes, sir, I'll call him. \^Exit. 

Irv. Have you mailed those checks, Pollard ? 
Pol. That's what I came down for, Mr. Irving. 

(Starts to go in store.') 

Irv. One moment, Pollard. (Pol. rettirns without speak- 
ing.') Who closed the office last night? 

Pol. Miss Remington. 

Irv. Miss Remington ! How did that happen ? 

Pol. She said she had some letters to write, so I didn't 
wait. 

Irv. Was she alone ? 

Pol. Adams was there, and Verne Gale came in before I 
left. 

Irv. What did he want ? 

Pol. He didn't say. 

Irv. Was Gale there when you came away? 

Pol. Yes, sir. 

Irv. That's all. Pollard ; I'll be at the office shortly. 

\^Exit Pol., r. 

Enter Tiufrom store. Comes down C. 

Tim. Almiry says you want to see me. What is it ? Any- 
thing new, Mr. Irving ? 

Irv. No, only I've learned that Gale was in my office last 
night after I went home. 

Tim. Well, nothin' strange in that, is there, seein's he's 
kinder friendly like with your typewriter? 

Irv. Possibly not ; but I 

Tim. What are you trying to drag Verne into this thing 
for? You don't think he's been takin' your money, do you? 

Irv. I haven't said yet what I think. 

Tim. Wal, you've given a mighty strong hint of what's in 
your mind. Now see here, Mr. Irving, Verne Gale's like an 
own son to me, an' if you're goin' to try to throw suspicion on 
him the sooner you git some one else to handle this job the 
better. 

Irv. Don't be hasty, Purdy. You shouldn't let sentiment 
interfere with your duty. 



a foul tip 21 

(Irv., r. c. Tim., l. c.) 

Tim. Sentiment ! It's a darn shame there ain't more of it 
in our dealin's with one another. 

Irv. Justice deals with facts, not feelings, Purdy. 

Tim. Not always with facts, not by a jugful, Mr. Irving. 
Of course you've noticed that justice is always pictured out as 
a female, an' that's the way justice ought to be, — tender and 
kind an' helpful, jest like a good woman; but mind you, Mr. 
Irving, they blindfold her so she can't see the mean things that's 
done in her name. 

Irv. I didn't come here to listen to a sermon, Purdy. 

Tim. I ain't preachin'. I'm jest stand in' out for fair play, 
that's all. What have you got against Verne Gale? 

Irv. Nothing ; but I'm determined to clear this matter up. 
I'm told that Gale is quite a sport. 

Tim. Wal, he's fond of baseball, if that's what you mean, 
but he's honest, Verne Gale is. I'd stake my last dollar on 
him. He's as square as a die. 

Irv. Perhaps he is, Purdy. I hope so for your sake, but I 
shall depend upon you to find out. [_£xif, r. 

Tim. So it's Verne he has set upon as the thief. Guess the 
wish is father to the thought. Wal, 'tain't Verne, he's out of 
it. Now who in the name of Sam Hill is it ? 

{Scratches his head. Crosses — sits on bench. In deep 
thought as Hiram enters with bundle of bats and mail bagy 
which he throws on platform of store.') 

Hiram. Express was a little late. There's Verne's bats, 
Tim. (^Crosses to l.) 
Tim. All right. 

Enter Almira. Comes down c. 

Almira. What did Mr. Irving want, Tim ? 
Tim. Nothing much. 

Almira. Must be somethin' special; been down here twice 
to see you. 

Tim. Yes, he has. 
Almira. Has what ? 
Tim. What you said. 
Almira. Said what? 

(Tim, l. c. Almira, c. Hiram, r. c.) 



22 A FOUL TIP 

Hiram. You said Irving' d been down here twice, Almira. 

Almira. Yes; that's what I said. What for? Do you 
hear, Tim? What for? 

Tim. For you to find out, by chowder. For goodness' 
sake, Ahiiira, can't you leave me alone a minute? 

Almira. You'd better keep a civil tongue in your head, 
Tim Purdy, or you'll find out something that won't be to your 
liking. I declare, Hiram, I'm afraid I'im's goin' to be sick. 
'Tain't a bit like him to talk back to me that way. 

[^Exits with mail bag. 

Hiram. Almiry's kinder cranky, ain't she? (Tiu doesn't 
answer.) Why don't ye speak, Tim? Ain't sick, be ye? 

Tim. No, jest thinkin', that's all. 

Hiram. Gosh, Tim, don't think too hard, it might go to 
your head. Speakin* 'bout thinkin', do you think marriage is 
a failure ? 

{Crosses and stands by Tim, who is still seated.) 

Tim. I dunno, Hi, leastwise I ain't prepared to say. 
Hiram. I was readin' in the Swamproot Almanick t'other 
day. It says that marriage is worse than a failure ; it's a panic. 
Tim. Sometimes I think 'tis, that's a fact, Hi. 

Enter Almira, quietly, 

Hiram. Wal, mebbe 'tis ; but seems to me it's flying in the 
face of Providence for you to say so, Tim. 

(Almira walks quietly up behind them,) 

Almira. For him to say what, Hiram? 

Tim '\ Great Caesar's ghost ! {Jumps up sud- 

V {together), denly.) 

Hiram j Thunder and lightnin' ! ( Crosses to l.) 

Almira. Now what's this mixture of Shakespeare an' the 
weather report mean, I want to know ? What're you talkin* 
about, you two ? 

Tim. The weather ; that's it, the weather. Looks as if we 
might git a shower. 

Hiram. Yes, git hail with it, too, I'm afraid. Oh, Tim, 
as I was sayin' jest before Almiry cum in, I want a bag of dry 
mash. Here, Almiry, take it out of that. 

{Hands bill. Exit Almira. Tim and Hiram both give a 

deep sigh of relief. ) 



A FOUL TIP 23 

Tim. Close call, Hi. Hens layin' well ? 

HiKAM. Fair to middlin' ; nothin' like Uraliah Higgins*, 
though. Last week one of his hens eat some tacks, an* the 
next day she laid a carpet. 

Tim. Sho ! You don't say ! 

Hiram. No, / don't say so. That's what Uraliah said. 
He thinks his pertaters are goin' to turn out bad this year. 

Tim. What's the matter with 'em? 

Hiram. He planted his onions right next to his pertaters, 
an' the onions make the pertaters' eyes water so much they're 
rottin' in the hill. 

Tim. Uraliah oughter known better'n that. 

Hiram. That's so. Now he's gone into fruit raisin'. Says 
he's goin' to graft milkweed on to his strawberry plants. Ex- 
pects to get strawberries and cream. 

Tim. 'Twon't work, Hi, he won't git nothin' but sour milk 
if his strawberries are as sour's the ones he sold me. 

Enter Almira. 

(Tim, r. c. Almira, c. Hiram, l. c.) 

Almira. I can't change this, Hiram. Ain't you got nothin' 
smaller ? 

Tim. Guess p'raps I can break it. What is it? 

Almira. A five. {Hands bill to him. ^ 

Tim {looking at bill carefully ; starting ; aside). One of 
the stolen bills, as I'm a sinner. (Aloud.) Where'd you git 
this bill, Hiram? 

Hiram. Why, what's the matter? Good, ain't it? 

Tim. Good enough, but I asked you where you got it 

Hiram. Got it from Verne Gale down to the depot. 

Tim. Verne Gale? {Aside.) No, no, it can't be possible. 
I won't believe it. {Aloud.) Oh, I see! Yes, yes. The 
express on the bats. 

Almira. What's struck you all at once, Tim ? Why don't 
you give me the change ? 

Tim. I'm goin' to, Almira. Confound it, can't you stop 
pester i n ' me ? ( Takes out bill- book from inside of vest. Gives 
Almira small bills. Looks at marked bill carefully before 
placing it in pocketbook.) There, Almiry, guess you can lix 
Hiram up now. (Almira and HmKU exeunt in store. Tim 
watches them off^ then takes out bill again and examines it.) It's 



24 A FOUL TIP 

one of the marked bills, no doubt about that. Now where did 
Verne git it ? That's the question. (Stands c. Conversation 
outside : *' The petinanf s as good as ours now. We can't lose 
with Adai7is in the box, and Verne Gale for tna?iager. No, 
that's right ; they're all right. ' ' Gale outside : ^^ Be on hand 
early this afternoofi, boys." ^' Sure ; all rights we will ^^ etc. 
Tim crosses l. Enter Gale. Comes to c.) Verne, you're 
jest the boy I want to see. 

Gale. What's up now, Uncle Tim ? You look excited. 

Tim. Guess I am a little. (Looks around to see that they 
are not overheard.) Now I don't want ye to mention this to 
any one, Verne, not a single soul ; but I've got a job on my 
hands, and I want you to help me out. 

Gale. Why, certainly; what is it? 

Tim. Some one broke into Irving's shoe factory last night 
and stole some money from his safe. 

Gale. Last night ? Why, that's strange. Wasn't Adams 
there ? 

Tim. I dunno ; but anyway, Mr. Irving's sorter put matters 
into my hands to see if I can run down the thief. 

Gale. Are you making any progress? 

Tim. Wal, yes, a little. I've found one of the missing bills. 

Gale. Good work, Uncle Tim. Who had it ? 

Tim. Hiram Rowell. (Hesitates.^ He said you paid it 
to him. 

Gale (astonished). I paid it to him ! Why, yes, I paid 
him for the express, but that money wasn't stolen. You're on 
the wrong track, Uncle Tim. 

Tim. By Judas, I hope I am, but here's the bill, an' it's one 
that Irving marked himself. See, there it is. (Shows mark.) 
Where'd you git it, Verne ? 

Gale. I got it from (Aside.) Great heavens ! It's 

the money Hal Irving gave me, and I pledged my honor not to 
tell. 

Tim. Can't you remember where ye got it, Verne? 

Gale. Why, no — that is, let me think, Uncle Tim, let me 
think. (Aside.) Stolen money! And Hal gave it to me! 
Could he have — no, no, I won't believe it. {Aloud.) I can't 
tell you now, Uncle Tim, but I'll help you solve the mystery 
if you'll give me time. 

Tim. You can't tell ? You must, Verne ! You must, for 
your own sake. Don't you see what a position it puts ye in ? 

Galk. I can't help it. There's a frightful mistake some- 



A FOUL TIP 25 

where, but I'm not a thief, Uncle Tim ! I don't need to tell 
you that. 

Tim. Then you are trying to shield some one. It's goin* 
to look mighty black for you, Verne, if you don't explain. 

Enier Nel., r., during last speech. 

Nel. Explain what, Uncle Tim ? What is it ? What has 
happened, Verne? 

(Nel., r. c. Gale, c. Tim, l. c.) 

Gale. Oh, it's something I can't understand, Nell. I paid 
out some money to-day; money that was stolen from Mr. 
Irving's safe, so Uncle Tim tells me. 

Nel. Money stolen, and you had it? But of course you 
can tell where you got it ? 

Gale. No, I can't, Nell ! I can't explain. It's impos- 
sible ! 

Tim. But why, Verne ? 

Gale. Don't ask me why ; don't ask me anything now. 

Enter Irv., r. 

Irv. Oh, I didn't expect to find you here, Gale. {^Glances 

at Nel. ) Your sister, I suppose ? 
Gale. Yes, Mr. Irving. 

(Irv. bo7vs slightly. Nel. returns the recognition.^ 

Irv. a very fortunate meeting, Purdy. Guess we can 
bring matters to a head right here. 

Tim. I don't quite follow you, Mr. Irving. 

Irv. Here is one of the stolen bills. {Produces bill.) It 
was paid to Adams, my watchman, by this young man. 

{Points to Gale.) 

Tim. Is that so, Verne ? 

Gale. I paid Adams some money, yes. 

Irv. Where did you get it ? 

(Nel., r. c. Irv., c. Gale, l. c. Tim, l.) 

Gale. I refuse to say. 

Ikv. Then you stole it from my safe. 

Nel. No, no, Mr. Irving, he did not ! 



26 A FOUL TIP 

Irv. He has not denied it. 

Gale. Deny it ! Of course I deny it ! I am not a thief. 

Irv. Unless you explain matters, the evidence is very 
strong against you, Gale. 

Nel. Oh, tell him, Verne ; tell him all. If you are inno- 
cent you must explain. 

Gale. If, Nell, if? Are you beginning to doubt me, 
too? (^Comes c.) 

Irv. How can she help it ? You're in a pretty tight box. 

Nel. Doubt you ! No, no, Verne. I didn't mean that. 
{Goes to Gale. Irv. crosses to r. front.) Mr. Irving, my 
brother is not a thief. He's always been good and honest, 
hasn't he. Uncle Tim? (Tim nods assent.) Yes, everybody 
who knows Verne knows he's honest. I have no father or 
mother, Mr. Irving, only Verne, the best brother a girl ever 
had. He has never failed me, never disappointed me, never 
proved unworthy a sister's love. He never will, Mr. Irving, 
he never will ! 

(^Embraces Gale, her head on his shoulder. Pete enters 
R. u. E. during above speech.) 

Tim (wiping eyes with red handkerchief). That's right, 
Mr. Irving ; it's jest as she says. 

Irv. If he's such a paragon of virtue, where did he get the 
stolen bill? The money he paid Adams? 

(Pete cojnes down c.) 

Pete. I can answer that question, Mr. Irving. 
All [Ox m.-^ excepted). You, Adams? 
Gale (thrusting '^ei.. aside; advancing to Ve.t^). Adams, 
not a word if you value ray friendship. 

Positions : 

Nel. 

Irv. Pete Gale Tim 



CURTAIN 



ACT II 

SCENE. — Same as Act I. As curtain rises lights are down^ 
with moonlight effect. Store lighted. Boys heard singing, 
shouting and blowing horns outside. They may introduct 
specialties on stage if desired, retiring before Almira and 
Mab. enter from store. During her dialogue with Mab., 
Almira lights the lamp in the lamp-post at corner of store, 
and stage lights are turned o?i. At the end of act, where 
the shoiver is gathering the stage lights should be turned 
off gradually until only store lights and that on lamp-post 
are left burning. Time, evening of same day. 

Enter Almira and MkB.,from store. 

Almira. Good land ! Them boys is enough to raise the 
dead. They've driv me most crazy with their carryin's on. 

{Lights lamp on platform. Stage lights up.) 

Mab. But they won the game ; I don't wonder that they're 
noisy. I wish I were a boy ; I'd fasten myself on to one of 
those horns so quick it would make your head swim. 

Almira. They're makin* my head swim without any of 
your help, Miss Remington. I wish Tim was here; he'd stop 
their racket mighty quick. 

Mab. I'll bet he's out there celebrating with them. 

Almira. More likely he's traipsin' round with Mr. Irving. 
(^Conies L. c.) Don't know what's goin' on between them 
two, do ye, Miss Remington ? 

Mab. (r. c). I am not curious about other people's affairs, 
Mrs. Purdy. 

Almira. No more am I; 'tain't my disposition. Besides, 
I don't have time. 

Mab. People who have nothing to do but to meddle with 
other people's affairs are usually very busy, I've observed. 

Almira {sharply). You're quite observin', ain't ye, Miss 
Reminglon? {Goes to lamp post. Fixes light.') But speakin* 
about the Irvings — Hal went away kinder sudden, didn't he? 

Mab. Rather sudden, yes. (Crosses to settee. Sits.) 

27 



28 A FOUL TIP 

Almira. What did he go for, business or pleasure ? 
(^Comes down l. c.) 

Mab. Yes. 

Almira (^puzzkii). That's what I thought. Don't know 
where he's gone, do ye ? 

Mab. No; I haven't the remotest idea. 

Almira. Gone away for his health ? 

Mab. Possibly. 

Almira. He looks well enough ; what's the matter with 
him ? 

Mab. Heart trouble ; very severe. 

Almira. Law me, how sad ! I suppose Nell Gale's all 
upset. 

Mab. I presume she is. 

Almira. Just think of it ! Heart trouble's most always 
fatal. (Dolefully.) What a nice couple Hal Irving and 
Nellie Gale would 'a' made. They're both about the same 
temperature. 

Mab. {smothering a laugh). You mean temperament, don't 
yon, Mrs. Purdy? 

Almira. Wasn't that what I said ? (Hiram heard singing 
outside.) There's Hi Rowell, singin's ef he never had a care 
in the world. His wife got stung, all right. They say there's 
fifty-seven different varieties of stingers, an' he's all of 'em. 

Enter Hiram, r., with mail-bag ; comes down c. 

Hiram. Howdy, Almiry. Evenin*, Miss Remington. (Lifts 
cap awkwardly.) Big mail to-night, Almiry. 

Almira. Yes; an* Tim off nobody knows where, leavin* 
me with all o' his work on my hands. 

Hiram. Wal, I s'pose he figgers that he's sorter helpin' you 
out in a way; 'cause when he ain't here you don't hev quite 
so much male to look after, do ye, Almiry? 

Mab. Is that a pun, Mr. Rowell? 

Hiram. Pretty good, ain't it ? 

(Mab., on bench. Hiram, c. Almira, l. c.) 

Almira. Not so bad, considerin' who made it. Wouldn't 
be s' prised ef Nancy was lookin' for her male, too. Second- 
class matter, though. That's a pun too, Hiram. 

l^Exits laughing, mail-bag in her hand. 



A FOUL TIP 29 

Hiram. Almiry's bound to hev the last word. Wouldn't 
be a woman if she didn't. 

Mab. Now, Mr. Rowell, that's unkind. 

Hiram. VVal, they all like to knock ; that is, all I've seen. 
As Shakespeare says: *' There's a divinity that shapes our 
ends rough, hew them as we may ! " I cal'late William had 
wimraen in mind when he writ that, Miss Remington. 

Mab. Are you fond of Shakespeare, Mr. Rowell ? 

Hiram. Wal, I think he's all right on the woman question. 

Mab. I'm afraid you're a pessimist. 

Hiram. No, I ain't. Fact is, 1 don't go to any church, — 
that is, not regular. 

Mab. Then you're not religiously inclined ? 

Hiram. Only when I'm sick. When a man's sick he wants 
some sort of religion an' a good woman in the house. 

Mab. Yes, they are both necessary. This is a union 
church, isn't it, Mr. Rowell? {Faints to church.) 

Hiram. Yes, that's what they call it. They're united in 
fightin' each other. 

Mab. Is it possible ? 

Hiram. Yes, fight like cats and dogs, sometimes. Got a 
pretty good sort of parson, though. He don't meddle with 
nuther rum, politics or rehgion. 

Mab. What does he preach about ? 

Hiram. Mostly about wimmen's rights, I guess, from what 
I hear. Gosh, no need to tell wimmen what their rights are. 

Mab. I hope you're not losing your faith in womankind, 
Mr. Rowell ? 

Hiram. Wal, some o' the samples I've seen make me feel 
sort o' shaky, that's a fact. (^Lowers voice.) Now, there's 
Almiry, for instance; nobody can't take no comfort when she's 
around. 

Mae. (aside). Nobody can't. {Aloud.) So you don't 
envy Mr. Purdy? 

Hiram. Me? Wal, I guess not. {Boys heard outside,) 
The boys is sorter whoopin' her up to-night, ain't they? 

Mab. Yes; wasn't it a glorious game? 

Hiram. I didn't see it, but it sounds that way. I hear 
your bookkeeper, Mr. Pollard, dropped quite a wad on it. 

Mab. I'm glad he did ; he deserves to lose, just for not 
backing the home team. {Rises from settee.) 

Hiram. By gosh, you're quite a sport, ain't ye ? Wal, 
guess I'll mosey along. Nancy'U be lookin' for that second- 



30 A FOUL TIP 

class matter Almiry was a-tellin' about. Good -night, Miss 
Remington. {Starts to exit l. ; eficoimters Pol.) Evenin', 
Mr. Pollard. 1 hear ye got trimmed. Guess you're in wrong. 
No use to buck agin Verne Gale. 

Pol. Things will come my way some time, Rowell. I'll 
have ray inning yet. [Goes doivn c. Hiram l.) 

Hiram. I c'n sympathize with ye, Pollard. We've all been 
there, as Mark Twain said about the baby. 

\^ExifL., chifckliiig. 

Mab. You are not celebrating to-night, Mr. Pollard? 

Pol. I should say not. 

Mab. The ^(^yi- are. Aren't they jubilant? 

Pol. It's a regular rough-house. I suppose they think the 
immaculate Gale and his henchman Adams are the loud noise 
all right. They'll have another think when Irving puts Gale 
behind the bars. 

Mab. He will never do that. 

(Mab., r. c. Pol., l. c.) 

Pol. Yes, he will ; just you wait and see. You'd better be 
prepared for a complete eclipse of your meteoric hero, Mabel. 

Mab. Who ever heard of a meteoric eclipse? 

Pol. I bow before your superior knowledge. Your meteor 
will not be eclipsed, but annihilated. 

Mab. Your attempts at brilliancy are painful, Mr. Pollard. 

Pol. Doubtless so to you. {Enter Pete, r. ; nods coolly 
to Pol. , raises hat to Mab. , and is about to exit in store when 
Pol. speaks.) Oh, I say, Adams, how do you like playing 
with a team that is backed with stolen money ? 

Pete. Supposed to have been stolen, you mean. 

{Comes c. Pol., l. c.) 

Pol. Well, supposed then. It'll amount to the same thing 
in the end. 

Pete. Did it make any difference in my pitching to-day? 

Mab. Well, I should say not, Adams. 

Pol. Wait till the boys hear about this Gale affair. The 
team will go all to pieces. 

Mab. I suppose you will make it your business to adver- 
tise it? 

Pol. Why not ? As correspondent of the Brewster Gazette 
I am expected to report all the news. 



A FOUL TIP 31 

Mab. What ! You are not going to have it printed ? 

Pol. Certainly. 

Pete. If you do, be careful what you say, or you'll answer 
to me for it. 

Pol. You ? You're getting a swelled head, Adams. I 
could say most anything, and Verne Gale wouldn't deny it. 

Pete. But I would. 

Mab. And so would I. 

Pol. Of course ^^z^ would, Mabel. Really I'm very sorry 
for you ; your idol is shattered. 

Mab. Save your sympathy for those who want it, and re- 
member also that to yotf I am Afiss Remington. 

Pol. Another chill. What is the next step in your freezing 
process ? 

Mab. Well, we will not discuss shattered idols, if you 
please. 

Pete. No, leave that out, or you'll have a broken head to 
talk about. 

Pol. {sneeringly). Listen to the joke from the end man. 

Mab. You'd better be careful, it may be no joke. Adams, 
I thank you. Mr. Pollard, I will bid you good-evening. 

Pol. Are you going, Mabel ? 

Mab. No ; Miss Remington, if you please. 

Pol. Well, Miss Remington, if you insist; do you mean 
that 

Pete. She means in plain English, get out ! 

{Motions Pol. off.') 

Pol. You think you stand pat with the hero and petticoat 
administration, don't you, Adams? And you, ilf/j-i- Reming- 
ton, you think Verne Gale is a paragon. He isn't ; he's a 
thief, a self- convicted thief. 

Pete. Pollard, you lie. {Throttles hirn.') Take back 
those words. {They struggle^ and Vety. forces Pol. to stage.) 

Mab. Uncle Tim ! Quick ! 

Enter Tim, l. Mab. rtins in store. 

Tim. Hi, hi, there ! What'n thunder's goin' on here? 
Here, stop it, Adams ; stop it, I say ! Great Scott, you'll 
choke him to death ! 

Pete. He deserves it. He called Verne a thief. 

Tim. Here, git up, Pollard. {Assists hifn to rise.) Adams 



32 A FOUL TIP 

didn't have no right to tackle ye, but by Judas, you'd better 
be careful how ye talk round here, or some one else'll git a-hold 
of ye. 

(Pol., r. Tim, c. Pete, l.) 

Pol. Talk ! I'll talk all I please, Tim Purdy. So you're 
standing up for the village pet, too, are you? You'd better 
be 

Tim. You'd better put the brakes on that tongue o' yours, 
Pollard. It's liable to git you into trouble. 

Pol. You can't shut me up, and your threats don't scare 
me either, Purdy. As for you, Adams, Pm not through with 
you. 

Pete {starting for Pol.). You can settle right now. 

Tim {restraining Pete). Let him alone, Adams, he's a lit- 
tle engine with a big whistle. {To Pol.) Now, Pollard, I'd 
advise you to go while you're in fairly good order an* condi- 
tion. I shan't hold myself responsible for what might happen 
if you don't go right now. 

Pol. I'm going, Purdy, but you'll sing another song when 
Mr. Irving gets after you. He's got influence enough to have 
you fired out of this town body and soul. 

Tim. Say, darn your picter, Pollard, it's agin human natur' 
to slan' any more o' this. Git now, or I'll make you walk 
Spanish. Do you hear? Git! 

Pol. You'll hear from me yet, Purdy. 

{T\^ forces Pol. off "el., then returns.') 
Tim. Blamed if he didn't git me hot under the collar. 
(Mab. at store door.) 
(Tim, r. Pete, l.) 

Mab. Is it all over ? 

Tim. Yes, the enemy has retreated for more ammunition. 

Pete. I fear I'm to blame for all this. 

Mab. Pollard got just what he deserved. We don't mind 
it a bit, do we, Mr. Purdy? 

Tim {doubtfully). Wal, I dunno. I suppose I ought to 
give you a good talkin' to, Adams, but if you hadn't 'a' done it, 
it would 'a' been up to me, I guess, so we'll call it square. 
While you was about it, though, I wish you'd 'a' plunked him 
a good one for mc, — just o?ie. 



A FOUL TIP 33 

Mab. Why, Uncle Tim, I'm surprised ; and you are chiet 
of police, too ! 

Tim. Yes, I know ; but I don't work at it every day, an' 
this is one of my off days. 

Mab. I hope you'll have them often. My, I'm so nervous 
I can't keep still. If you see Nellie will you tell her to come 
up to the house, please. Uncle Tim ? 

Tim. Yes, if I can remember to. I'm sorter stirred up 
myself. {Exit Mab., r.) I'd advise you to keep an eye on 
Pollard. He may do you harm. 

Pete. I'm not afraid of him, but he would lose no chance 
to injure Verne. 

Tim. I know that. He's workin' hand an' glove with Irv- 
ing to make out that Verne took that money. 

Pete. But he didn't ! Verne is innocent. I knov/ it. I 
can swear to it. 

Tim. If you are so dead certain about it, what's the use of 
keepin' your mouth shet ? 

Pete. I can't say anything; Verne won't let me ! I sup- 
pose he knows what he's about. We'll have to let him alone. 

Tim. Let him alone ! Oh, yes, that's easy enough said, 
but how are we a-goin' to stand Irving off, an' him set on havin' 
Verne locked up? 

Pete. I can't help it. It's no use for me to argue with 
him, if his own sister and Miss Remington can't coax it out of 
him. But Verne shall never be arrested, Mr. Purdy. I'll tell 
everything rather than that, promise or no promise. \^Exit, r. 

Tim. It's plain enough that Adams knows who took the money, 
an' by heck I ain't a-goin' to rest until I find out who 'tis. {Picks 
up pockctbook dropped by Pol. inscuffle. ) Hullo ! A pocketbook. 
{Ope?is it.) Pollard's. Must have dropped it when Adams 
shut off his wind. {Continues to examine contefits.) Whew ! 
Pretty well fixed. Must get a good salary and be savin' of his 
money. Some of the boys call him a ''tight-wad." {Foot- 
steps outside. Tim puts pocketbook in coat pocket. Tim, c. 
Enter Pol., r. ; looks around stas;e.) Lost anythin', Mr. 
Pollard ? 

Pol. {surlily). I've lost my pocketbook. 

Tim. Is this it? {Produces book,) 

Pol. Yes, that's mine. 

Tim. No donbt about it? 

Pol. Certainly not. I guess I know my own pocketbook 
when 1 see it. 



34 A FOUL TIP 

Tim. It's a pretty fat one. {Hands book.') Ef I's you, 
Pollard, I wouldn't carry so much money around in my hip 
pocket. (Pol. starts off without thanking Tim.) You're 
quite welcome. {Exit Pol.) I didn't expect any thanks 
anyway. Stands to reason he ain't got no great love for 
me. (r.) 

Almira {from store door). Back, be ye? 

Tim. Looks that way, don't it? 

Almira. Now you jest walk yourself in here an' tell me 
what you've been up to all day. (Tim doesn't answer.) Did 
you hear me speak ? 

Tim. Sure ! Nothin' new to hear you speak. 

\^Exit in store. 

Enter Gale and Pete, r. 

Gale. Now, Adams, tell me what you meant by your dra- 
matic statement to Mr. Irving this forenoon. 

Pete. I wanted Irving to know where you got that money. 

Gale. Do you know ? 

Pete. Yes ; Hal Irving gave it to you. 

Gale. Careful, Adams, not so loud. Well, admitting that, 
what then ? You don't think he — he 

Pete. Stole it ? I'm afraid he did. I saw him take some 
money from his father's safe. 

Gale {amazed). You saw him ! You say you saw him, 
Adams ? 

(Pete, r. c. Gale, l. c.) 

Pete. Yes ; but I gave it no thought at the time. 

Gale. Tell me about it, tell me everything. There is, 
there must be some mistake. What did you see ? 

Pete. Well, quite late last night, say half-past nine or ten, 
Hal and his father came into the office. They talked quite a 
while and both got very excited, Hal especially. 

Gale. Talked about what ? 

Pete. The Western trip. Hal didn't want to go. 

Gale. Do you know why? 

Pete. I heard your sister's name mentioned several times. 

Gale. Well, what then ? 

Pete. Then they went out together. Later Hal came 
back alone. I was in the shipping room and through the 
window I saw him go to the safe and open it. I went into 
the office. When Hal saw me he said, '' Hello, Adams, I 



A FOUL TIP 35 

thought you were in the engine room." I talked with him a 
minute or two and went back into the shipping room. In a 
little while Hal opened the door, said good-night and went out. 

Gale. But did you see him take any money ? Are you 
sure of that ? 

Pete. Yes, I saw him. Why, of course he took it, Verne ; 
he gave you some of it. 

Gale {as if to himself). Hal, old boy, I'm afraid you've 
got us both into a bad mess. {To Pete.) What was Hal 
doing when he saw you? 

Pete. He was counting some bills. 

Gale. You didn't see him close the safe? 

Pete. No, I didn't stay. I didn't think it strange that he 
was there. He frequently comes in evenings, but when I 
heard about the robbery it all came back to me. Why didn't 
you let me speak, Verne ? 

Gale. Because Hal is my friend ; because to ray sister he 
is — well, you know what they are to each other. Do you real- 
ize what it would mean to Nell if she thought Hal took that 
money ? 

Pete. Whose good name would she value most, yours or 
Hal Irving's? 

Gale. She knows I'm innocent. Hal is not here to defend 
himself; we must stand by him for Nell's sake. 

Pete. Well, don't run away with the idea that I'm going 
to stand around like a dummy and hear Irving throw it into 
you like he did this forenoon. 

Gale. Yes, you are ; you must. 

Pete. And let you be called a thief? What will your 
friends say ? 

Gale. My friends will stand by me. I can get along 
without the others. Now keep quiet. 

Pete. All right, if you say so, but you'll have to muzzle 
me if I hear any more talk from Irving or Pollard. I've had 
one little argument with Pollard already. 

Gale. What's wrong with Pollard? 

Pete. Look out for him ; he's no friend of yours. 

Gale. I'm open to congratulations. 

Pete. It's no joke; he's underhanded and tricky. He'd 
do most anything to throw you down. 

Gale. Pshaw, Adams. Stop your croaking ! 

{They cross. Gale, r. ; Pete, l.) 



36 A FOUL TIP 

Pete. I'm not croaking ; you don't understand, Verne. 
You're white through and through ; so white that you would 
sacrifice your own good name to save Hal Irving's. So white 
that you treat 7?ie like a brother; nie^ a nigger, as Pollard calls 
me. I am a nigger^ but I am wliite enough to be loyal to the 
best friend Pve got, and I'm going to stand by you, Verne; 
Pm going to fight for you to the finish. 

Gale {grasping Pete's hand ; with feeling). White 
enough to be loyal to your best friend. Ah, Adams, old 
sport, there are white men who are not white enough for that. 
But tell me, Adams, how did that five I paid you get around 
to Mr. Irving so quickly ? 

Pete. I asked Miss Remington to change it for me. Mr. 
Irving found it in the money drawer, and when he asked me 
where I got it, I told him. I did not know about the robbery 
then. 

Gale. Of course not ; that's all right. I just wanted to 
know, that's all. 

Enter Tim. 

Tim. No use try in' to keep any thin' from Almiry. She 
wouldn't give me a minute's peace till I told her the whole 
story. 

(Gale, r. c. Tim, c. Pete, l. c.) 

Gale. It doesn't matter. Uncle Tim; it'll soon be town 
talk, anyway. We must make the best of it. 

Tim. I don't suppose it's any use to try to reason with ye, 
Verne, but it does seem to me that in justice to your sister and 
yourself, not to mention the rest of us, you ought to clear this 
thing up. 

Gale. In justice to my sister and myself, I can't. Uncle 
Tim. Come along, Adams. [Exeunt both. 

Tim. In justice to his sister and himself, he ca?i't. Now, 
what in timenation did he mean by that? {Meditates.) I 
wonder, I jest wonder, now, if 

Enter Hiram, l. 

Hiram. Anythin' new 'bout the robbery, Tim? 
Tim. No ; who told you about it ? 

Hiram. Pollard ; he says no doubt Verne Gale did it. I 
think more likely 'twas the nigger. 



A FOUL TIP 37 

Tim. Adams? Not much. 

Hiram. Yes-sir-ree ! He's the man, I bet ye. 

Tim. You'd like mighty well to make him out a rascal, 
wouldn't ye, Hi ? 

Hiram. Wal, I'd pick him for a crook sooiier'n I would 
Verne Gale. Who had a better chance to take the money, 
tell me that ? 

Tim. Pollard had, for that matter. 

Hiram. Verne wouldn't have no object in shieldin' Pol- 
lard, would he? Pollard ain't no friend o' his, I reckon. 
Might as well try to lay it onto Hal Irving. 

Tim. Hal Irving? {Aside.) I was jest wondering. (Aloud.) 
Hal Irving, did you say? 

Hiram. Yes ; I hear that he an' his father ain't on the best 
of terms lately. 

Tim. You mustn't pay any attention to what gossips say, 
Hi. 

Hiram. Wal, I got this from your wife, Tim. Anyway, I 
guess you'll find the nigger's the thief, all right. 'Tain't none 
o' my business, though ; I ain't workin* on the job. 

Tim. No, that's right. 

Hiram. I can't see's anybody's makin' much headway on 
it for that matter. 

Tim. Now you jest stop your knockin', Hi Rowell. I cal'- 
late I'm capable of handUn' this affair. 

Hiram. Oh, yes, you're capable. Flyin' machines is ca- 
pable of flyin', but they don't alius fly. \^Exit in store. 

Tim. Hi is all-fired tantalizin'. {Meditates.) Hal Irving ! 
By heck, I don't know of a livin' soul that Verne Gale would 
be more likely to stand up for than Hal. It's somethin' to 
work on. 

Enter Gale, r. 

Gale. Some of the boys are giving me the cold shoulder 
already. It's a bad mess, isn't it ? 

Tim. Bad for somebody, but I've got a clue that lets you 
out. 

Gale. Heavens ! Has Adams said anything ? 

Tim. Not yet, but he'll tell everythin' before he'll see you 
arrested. 

Gale. He must not ! For heaven's sake, Uncle Tim, let 
Adams alone. Isn't it enough for me to stand for this without 
dragging any one else into it ? 



38 A FOUL TIP 

Tim. I want to prove your innocence, Verne. 

Gale. I know you do, but this is a muddle that you can't 
straighten out. 

Tim. I've got to do somethin' to stand Irving off. He's 
bound to have you arrested. 

Gale. No, no, Uncle Tim, he must not. You must not 
let him. He cannot force the truth from me, but I'm not so 
sure of Adams. 

Tim. I'll do all I can for you, Verne, but Irving's bound 
to make trouble for you. 

Gale. I know he is. It isn't the money, that's nothing to 
him. He wants to disgrace me. He is striking at my honor ; 
he's using a dangerous weapon, Uncle Tim. We must see to 
it that it does not r^ach his own heart. 

Tim. I doubt '\( he's got one, but somehow I don't quite 
follow you in that last remark o' yours. 

(Gale, r. c. Tim, l. c.) 

Gale. It was nothing. Don't heed what I'm saying. I'm 
tired, so tired. Uncle Tim. The game and all, you know ; 
my head is splitting. 

Tim. I don't wonder at it. I can't make head nor tail of 
this affair, Verne, but your old Uncle Tim's with you, heart 
and soul, through thick and thin, remember that. 

{They cross.) 

Gale. Uncle Tim (wi^/i emofion), I can't thank you 
now; there's a great big lump right here. (^Poitits to throat.) 
Oh, I wish all hearts were as great and kind as yours. It 
would be a different world for a lot of poor boys. But I'll 
make good, Uncle Tim ; you'll never have reason to be ashamed 
of Verne Gale, and Nell can look Mr. Irving in the face and 
tell him that whether she ever bears his family name or not, 
she has a brother who will maintain the honor of her own. 

\^Exit, R. 

Tim. a guilty boy would never talk that way. Verne's 
innocent ; I'll stake my life on it. He's shieldin' somebody, 
I don't know who nor what for; but I'll find out, and I'll 
make somebody smart for it. \^Exit. 

{Diatogue betiveen Hiram and Almira in store. Speak 
clearly and distinctly.) 



A FOUL TIP 39 

HiKAM. Got any new records, Almiry ? 
Almika. Yes, some slick ones ; came yesterday. Jest listen 
to this. 

{Xylophone solo, '' Mocking Bird,'' Hiram comes out and 
sits in chair by door while record is playing.') 

Hiram. Say, Almiry, what sort of a instrument is that ? 
Enter Almira. 

Almira. It's a zillyphone. Good, ain't it? 

Hiram. Pretty fair ; kinder stutters some, though, don't 
it? 

Almira. Stutters, you numbhead ! No, that's the way 
they play it. A man stands up an' jest hits pieces of wood 
with little mallets. That's what does it. {Comes down \..) 

Hiram. Oh, git out ! You couldn't git no noise like that 
out o' slicks of wood. 

Almira. Wal, I never heard no noise of any kind in your 
wood-pile, Hiram. 

Hiram. Smart, ain't ye ? {Rises, comes down l. c.) I 
don't see what Tim wants a talkin' machine for anyway, less'n 
you're goin' on a vacation. 

Almira. Wal, 1 ain't goin' on no vacation. Hi Rowell ; 
I'm goin' to stay right here an' tend store an' sort mail till Tim 
gits this robbery business settled. 

Hiram. Wal, 's I said before, it don't stand to reason that 
Verne Gale did it. 

Almira. No, an' I don't believe Adams did, either. I tell 
ye who the thief is, Hiram ; it's that Remington girl, that's 
who 'tis. She's a sassy little hussy, anyway. 

Hiram. Now / think she's a mighty clever gal. She 
speaks up kinder pert once in a while, but I'll bet she's 
honest. No, Almiry, no white person ever took that money. 
The nigger stole it. It'll come out jest as I say. Now you 
see. 

Almira. You needn't talk to me; I've had my suspicions 
o* that girl from the time I fust sot eyes on her. She stole the 
money an' Verne found it out. Now he's riskin' his good 
name to protect her. It's jest like him. What Verne Gale 
can see about that impudent jade to go crazy over is raore'n I 
can make out. 

Hiuam. Wal, if Mabel Remington stole that money she's 



40 A FOUL TIP 

playin' Verne for a sucker all right. As Shakespeare says : 
" Natiir' makes some men fools all the time, but wimmen make 
all men fools some o' the time." P'raps Verne's gettin' his 
lesson right now, 

Almira. I ain't much on Shakespeare, but so far's fools is 
concerned / wouldn't try to improve on what natur' has done 
for most o' the men I know. 

Hiram. Wal, you fooled one man all right. 

Almira. Who ? 

Hiram. Tim. 

Ai.MiRA. JVo, sir / Tim had his wisdom teeth cut when he 
married me ; most sensible thing he ever did. 

Hiram. I never heard Tim say so ; but that's neither here 
nor there. 

Almira. No, an' bein' a family affair it's none of your 
business anyway ; but don't ye forgit, Hi Rowell, that Mabel 
Remington stole that money. 

Hiram. Don't talk to me ! I'll bet ye a pint o' peanuts 
that Adams did it. 

Almira {severely). You know well enough that I never 
gamble ; it's agin my principles. 

Hiram. No, you ain't got no sportin' blood ; all you c'n 
do is talky jest talk. 

Almira. I c'n do somethin' besides talk. Actions speak 
louder'n words. {Gets broom?) Now you light out. {Flour- 
ishes broom.) Git now ! 

Hiram. Put up your broom ; I was only foolin'. Play me 
jest one more record, then I'll go. 

(Almira, r. c. Hiram, l. c.) 

Almira. You don't deserve it, but they say music has 
charms to soothe the savage beast, so I'll try it on you. 

Hiram. That's it, that's it, rub it in ! It's no sorter use 
to talk with you, Almiry ; you alius git the last word. Now 
let the machine have a show. 

Almira {going inside). Here's a good one, Hi. '' Moon- 
light on the Lake." 

{As the record is played boys and girls with horns, flags y 
etc.y come in one by one and listen attefitively. At finish 
they express approval in a noisy 7vay. Exit Hiram, r.) 

Enter Mab., r. 



A FOUL TIP 41 

Mab. It was a great victory, boys. You did yourselves 
proud. 

Voice, What's the matter with the Westvale nine ? 

(Mab., c. Boys, l.) 

All. That's all right. 

(^Horns, cheers^ waving of flags , etc.') 

Voice. Three cheers for Manager Gale. Whoop 'er up ! 
One, two, three. 

Mab. Now three more for Adams and his curves. 

Voice. You bet, he's all to the good. 

\1k^. (^flourishing flag). One, two, three. {At last flourish 
Ihv. enters r., and Mab., not seeing him, hits him with the 
flag. Mab., efnbarrassed.) Oh, Mr. Irving, I beg your 
pardon. 

Irv. What is this, a class in physical culture? 

Mab, No, sir, vocal culture. 

Irv. What's all this noise about, Miss Remington ? 

Voice. About over, I guess. 

(^The crowd gradually withdraws and leaves Irv. and Mab. 
alone.) 

(Irv., r. c. Mab., l. c.) 

Mab. We're celebrating. Our club won again to-day. 

Irv. Our club. 

Mab. Yes, the Westvales. It's a dandy team. 

Irv. a what ? 

Mab. a fine team, sir ; everybody is rooting for it. 

Irv. Rooting ? 

Mab. I mean everybody is enthusiastic over it. We've 
won eight games out of eleven. 

Irv. Indeed ! Are you one of the rooters ? 

Mab. Yes, sir ! Are you making fun of me? 

Irv. No, indeed. I rather like your loyal spirit. Does it 
extend to the club's manager also ? 

Mab. Yes, certainly. 

Irv. You and Verne are pretty good friends, aren't you ? 

Mab. Why, yes, that is, we were schoolmates, and of 
course 

Irv. {meaningly). Yes, of course. Well, that's all right, 
only don't carry your loyalty too far. 



42 A FOUL TIP 

Mab. I don't see how any one can be too loyal to their 
friends. 

Irv. Friends sometimes prove unworthy. Now take Verne 
Gale for instance. 

Mab. Ah, now I understand what you mean, Mr. Irving. 
Do you think Verne Gale took your money ? 

Irv. I have no doubt about it. 

Mab. {with spirit). Well, I have, Mr. Irving. 

Irv. It is very easy for a young girl to make mistakes. 

Mab. It is easy for any one to make mistakes. You are 
mistaken, if you think Verne Gale is a thief. 

Irv. If he isn't, why doesn't he prove his innocence ? Why 
doesn't he tell where he got that money ? 

Enter Nel., l. 

Mab. He will prove his innocence ; he told me so. 

Irv. And you believed him ? 

Mab. Believed him ? Of course I did ! Verne is inno- 
cent, and I'll help him prove it, let the guilt fall where it may, 
even if it be upon your own son. 

Irv. Silence, Miss Remington. {Sternly.) You must not 
couple my son's name with this affair, even by a chance 
remark. 

Nel. {coming down). You are right, Mr. Irving. 

Mab. What, Nell, you here? 

(Irv., r. c. Nel., c. Mab., l. c.) 

Nel. Yes, dear. Mr. Irving, you are jealous of your son's 
good name. Do you think my brother's honor is less precious 
to me ? You are a wealthy man. Your son does not know 
what poverty means. I pray God he never will, but Verjie 
knows; I know. We have fought it together. It has made a 
man of Verne, Mr. Irving, a man strong and self-reliant. Do 
you think he would dishonor his young manhood, sacrifice viy 
trust in him, lose the respect of his friends by doing a mean or 
dishonest act ? 

Irv. The evidence answers your question, Miss Gale. 

Nel. But you don't know Verne, Mr. Irving; you don't 
know him. Oh, if you only did, you would see how impossible 
it would be for him to do such a thing. What can I say to 
make you understand ? 

Irv. {coldly). Nothing, Miss Gale. Spare yourself. 

(Nel. crosses ; comes doivn to settee, ) 



A FOUL TIP 



43 



Nel. No, I'll not spare myself, Mr. Irving. You shall yet 
see Verne as /see him, as he is, good, noble, honest. {Plead- 
ingly.) Mr. Irving, I am a stranger to you ; the story of our 
struggles cannot interest you, but remember, I am pleading for 
my brother, for his good name, and I ask you to listen. Will 
you, Mr. Irving, will you Hsten patiently for a moment ? 

Irv. {looking at waicK). Go on. 

(l. , music ; ' * Departed Days. " ) 

Nel. {as if to herself). Oh, how clearly it all comes back 
to me. It was in the spring time, Mr. Irving ; Verne had given 
up his school and found work in a factory town. I will not 
worry you with the circumstances which made this necessary. 
He had never been away from home before, never left us alone, 
and that bright morning after he had said good-bye to father 
and mother, I walked down to the station to see him off. As 
we turned from the garden path we looked back at our little 
home. Mother, brave little mother, stood in the door waving 
her farewell, pausing only to wipe the tears from her eyes. 
Father was at the open window, his hand raised as if in silent 
benediction. There they were, our father and mother, heart- 
sore and sad, each hiding from the other the pain that was in 
that parting. Verne was brave, as he always is, but his eyes 
filled with tears. He took my hand in his and said : *' Little 
sister, I don't know what I'm going to face, but I'm going to 
make good. I shall live with the thought of those dear eyes 
always upon me as they are now." {Speaks brokenly.^ There 
are two vacant chairs in our home now, Mr. Irving, but Verne 
has not forgotten ; he can look father and mother in the face 
when {Breaks down.) Oh, it's cruel of you, Mr. Irv- 
ing, to — to {Sits on settee ; hides face in hands.) 

Irv. Really, Miss Gale, you must control yourself. You 
are making this unfortunate affair very disagreeable for me, 
and very painful for yourself. I must bid you good -evening. 

\Exit, R. 

(Mab. goes to Nel.) 

Mab. {half crying). The mean old wretch ! His heart is 
as hard as a boarding-house biscuit. Come, Nell, let's go 
home. 

(Nel. is drying her eyes with handkerchief. Distant thun- 
der heard.) 



44 A FOUL TIP 

Nel. {timidly). Was that thunder, Mabel ? 
Mab. I think so. {Dull flash and quite loud thunder.) 
Yes, there it is again. It's coming nearer. 

Enter Kluira. from store. 

Almira. That's gettin' pretty close, ain't it? My good- 
ness, girls, don't stand under that tree. 

Enter Hiram hurriedly, r. 

Hiram. It's goin' to be a cracker. It's been comin* up all 
day. Nancy'U be scairt blue. {Hurries off i..) 

Almira. Nothin' short o' chain lightnin' would make Hiram 
speed up like that. {Vivid flash, loud thunder .) That wasn't 
far off, was it ? 

Nel. No, it's coming nearer ; see how black and angry the 
clouds are. Soon the storm will break. Ah, Mabel, that's 
what life has been for me ; clouds and storm and a little sun- 
shine ; but always sof?te clouds. I wonder if there'll ever be 
the clear blue sky and the sunshine of a perfect day for me? 

{Flash and thunder at same time.) 

Almira {screaming). Tim ! Tim ! Where be ye ? Here, 
girls, git in here, quick. {Pushes them in store.) That struck 
somewhere, I know it did. Tim ! Tim-o-thee ! {Reflection 
of fire on stage. ) What's that, a fire? 'Tis as sure as gospel. 
For mercy's sake, where is everybody? 

{Shouts and confusion outside ; if practical, sound of fire 
department responding to bell alarm. Reflection on stage 
grows brighter.) 

Tim {outside). Come on, boys, quick ! Everybody! {En- 
ters hurriedly.) Get my rubber coat quick, Almiry ; the shoe 
factory's struck an* burnin' like tinder. 

(Tim, r. c. Almira, l. c. Nel. and Mab., l.) 

{Eor curtain call Almira is seen helping Tim on with coat. 
Business. Nel. and Mab. have old shawls or ivater- 
proofs, and are preparing to go to the fire. Thunder and 
flash ad lib. ) 

(Tim, r. c. Almira, c. Mab., l. c. Nel., l.) 
CURTAIN 



ACT III 

SCENE. — Same as before. Time : Afternoon, five days later. 
Nel.'s birthday. As curtain rises phonograph is phiying 
'■^Sweetest Story Ever Told,^^ Edison A?nberoI Record, 
by Venetian Trio. Nel. comes from store, letter in hand, 
crosses to bench R., sits, opens letter and reads. She should 
indicate by action and expression thai the letter at first 
interests, then ?nystifies, until the full meanijig of it, as re- 
vealed later, dawns upon her. Here is an opportunity for 
Nel. to do some excellent work in pantomime a7id facial ex- 
pression. A careful study of high-class moving pictures ivill 
show what can be accomplished in situations of this charac- 
ter. As music stops, Hiram speaks to Almira, who is in 
store. 

Hiram. Thet's a good one, Almiry, mighty good. What's 
the name of that piece ? 

Enter Almira, fashiofi paper in hafid. 

Almira. "Oh, tell me that you love me, for that's the 
sweetest story ever told." 

Hiram. Guess not ! You'll have to excuse me, Almiry. 
I couldn't tell a lie ! 

Almira. You great numbhead ! That's the name of the 
record. 

Hiram. Oh, that's it ! 

Almira. You love me / The idee ! Jest let me ketch you 
at it. 

Hiram. You never will, Almiry ! Don't lose no sleep over 
that. (^Interests himself in paper.) 

Almira (coming down l. c, watching Nel. a moment cu- 
riously). Finished your letter, Nell ? 

(Nel., preoccupied, doesn't answer.) 

Hiram {looking up). Guess from the way she acts it must 
be one o' them "sweetest story ever told " sort o' letters. 

Almira. Now you stop naggin' Nell. 

Hiram. I ain't naggin' ; guess I c'n say what I think, 
can't I ? 

Almira. Wal, 'tain't no concern o' yourn, anyway. {Opens 

45 



46 A FOUL TIP 

magazine.') I hope teacher won't come for this till I've read it 
through. {Crosses over to Nel.) Look, Nell, ain't the new 
hats somethin* elegant? I'm goin' to hev my straw done over. 

(Almira comes over to Nel.) 

Nel. {rising and speaking nervously). Please excuse me, 
Mrs. Purdy. I can't — oh, I must go now. 

Almira. Why, what's the matter, Nell? 

Nel. Don't ask me; I can't tell you now. I can't talk 
about it. \_Exit hurriedly, r. 

(Almira crosses to l. Turns to Hiram.) 

Almira {impressively). Now what do you suppose that 
means, Hiram ? Bad news, I bet ye. 

Hiram. Guess the music was too much for her. 

{Rises y comes down to bench.) 

Almira. 'Tain't nothin' to joke about; there's trouble 
somewhere; I c'n feel it in the air. {Sits on bench.) 

Hiram. You're foolish to feel for it; it'll find ye quick 
enough. {Looks at paper.) Wonder what the Gazette's got 
for Westvale news this week ? 

Almira. It never has much, an* what it does print ain't 
half true. 

Hiram, Let's see. {Reads aloud.) Uraliah Higgins of 
Westvale spent the week-end in Brewster. {Looks up.) Huh. 
I'll bet that's all he did spend except his car fare, 

Almira. Uraliah ain't to blame ; he has to figger mighty 
close to make both ends meet. 

Hiram. Don't you believe it. He's got money enough. 
He's close, Uraliah is ; it's jest as he told a feller t'other day. 
One of them city chaps was over to Uraliah's tryin' to sell him 
a automobile. "No, sir," says Uraliah, "I've been vacci- 
nated in my pocketbook, an' it took." {Enter Pol., r.) 
Look here, Pollard, be you the feller that writes up the West- 
vale news ? 

Pol. Yes ; I am the local representative of the Gazette. 

Hiram, Healthy representative you be. Anybody'd think 
to read this here piece about the ball game that you're rootin* 
for the Brewster nine; you don't give our boys a square deal. 

Pol. What's the matter — do you want me to throw a lot of 
boiiGuets ? 



A FOUL TIP 47 

(Hiram, r. c. Pol., c. Almira, l. c.) 

Hiram. Wal, I think it pays in the long run to tell things 
about as they are. . , 

Almira. That's what I say. Now, that piece about the 
shoe factory fire didn't mention Verne Gale's name at all 

Pol So you are also a hero worshipper, Mrs. Furdy t 

Almira. Wal, I'd never git down on my knees to you. 

Pol. I should hope not. 

Almira. Don't git sassy, young fellow. As for the news, 
we want it jest as it is, as Hiram says. 

Hiram. That's right, Almiry. Now, here's something about 
the fire that reads right and is right. Jest listen to this, Pol- 
lard. It starts in: - Mr. Editor : Writing for papers isn tin 
my line, but when news is printed about Westvale we folks 
that Uve here want it printed right. That is some of us do 
There, Pollard, Almiry and me ain't the only ones that thmk 

so. 

Pol. Nevermind; goon. 

Hiram. Let me see, where was I ? Oh, here :- Now for 
instance, in the piece about the shoe factory fire Saturday 
night, your paper didn't say a word about what a brave thing 
Verne Gale did. All it said was that Irving was overcome by 
smoke and was rescued by firemen. Now, we have got a good 
fire company here in Westvale, and they worked hard but 
Mr. Editor, the hero at that fire was Verne Gale. Hear that, 

Pollard ? , , . 

Pol Yes ; I expected that would come next. 

Hiram. Wal, it ought to. Here's some more: "Mr. 
Irving went into his office and it wasn't a minute before it was 
filled with smoke, thick and black. When Gale heard about 
it he rushed in and found Mr. Irving on the floor most suffo- 
cated Gale dragged him out jest in time to save his lite. 
These are the straight facts, Mr. Editor, and facts^x^ what we 
want over here in Westvale. That is, most of us do as I said 
before. Yours respectfully, Timothy Purdy. There, Pol- 
lard, that's the way we want our news 1 

{Rises. Pol. and Hiram cross.') 

Pol. I see ! You want a lot of complimentary nonsense 
about a crook. 

Almira. Verne Gale ain't no crook. 

HiRAi^L We know well enough who the thief is. 



48 A FOUL TIP 

Almira. Besides, Irving ain't goin' to do anythin' about it, 
anyway. 

Pol. He hasn't changed his mind about who took the 
money, thougli. 

Almira. 1 guess if the truth was known he'd change it 
mighty sudden. 

Pol. What do you mean ? 

Almira. Leave it to Tim. He ain't lettin' no grass grow 
under his feet, even if he ain't sayin' much. 

Pol. Wliat's Purdy dug up now? 

Almira. Mr. Purdy, from those who are not his betters, 
young man. 

Hiram. Stung, Pollard ! But you ain't answered his ques- 
tion, Ahniry ! 

Almira. I ain't givin away any secrets. 

Hiram. I never knew ye to keep one. 

Almira. Wal, Pm keepin' tins one. So far's you're con- 
cerned, Mr. Pollard, we all know what makes you so bitter 
agin Verne Gale. 

Pol. Indeed ! 

Almira. Yes, you're jealous because Verne cut you out 
with Mabel Remington. 

Pol. Nonsense ! 

Hiram. Verne didn't cut him out, Almiry; Pollard never 
had a look in with Mabel. 

Pol. Cut that, you country bumpkin. You're getting 
altogether too personal. 

Hiram. Country bumpkin, am I? By Judas, I'd rather 
be a country bumpkin than a city bum. 

Almira. Don't git excited, Hiram ! Keep cool, keep cool ! 

Hiram. I'm cool enough, but I ain't a-goin' to allow no 
imitation of a man to throw aspersions on my character. 

Pol. Bravo ! Bravo ! 

Almira. Guess you must 'a' got that word from teacher, 
Hi. He ain't throwed nothin' at ye that won't come off. 

Hiram. Oh, you can "bravo, bravo," all you darn please, 
Pollard. You an' Irving come down here with the idea that 
we're a lot of Jays an' Rubes. We ain't. We may look it, but 
we ain't. We know beans, an' we c'n tell a bad egg when we 
see it. You ain't fooled us none. 

Pol. Wise [)eople keep their mouths shut, Rowell. You 
and — some others {looking sharply at Almira) talk too much. 

Almira. Mean in' me, 1 suppose ? 



A FOUL TIP 49 

Pol. You've guessed it. 
Almira. If I have anythin' to say, I say it. 
Pol. Doesn't the proverb say, " He that controlleth his 
tongue is greater than he who taketh a city ' ' ? 

Almira. Yes, he. Nothing said about a woman. 
Hiram. No ; can't expect a woman to hold her tongue. 
Pol. {aside). Score one for the Rube. 
Almira. Shut up, Hiram. This ain't your funeral. 

Enter Tim and Pete, r. 

(PoL.jR. Pete, r. c. Tim, c. Hiram, l. c. Almira, l.) 

Tim. Hi, they want you down to the depot. 

Hiram. What is it, a teaming job ? 

Tim. Yes. (Hiram exits r. Pol. starts to follow.') Wait 
a minute, Pollard. (Pete co7nes down r. Pol. comes back 
to Tim. Tim, to Almira. ) Verne been here this morning ? 

Almira. Ain't seen him. 

Tim. Wish you'd see if you c'n find him an' tell him to 
come right over here. 

Almira. What's up now ? 

Tim. Never mind ; find Verne Gale. 

Almira. You needn't be so close-mouthed about it. 

(^Exits in store, comes out with old sunbonnet on, crosses 
stage and exits r. Watches Tim and others closely as she 
goes out.) 

Pol. {looking at watch). You'll have to excuse me. I've 
stayed too long already. 

(Pete, r. c. Pol., c. Tim, l. c.) 

Tim. I ain't disputin' that, but we'll have to git along with 
your company a spell longer. 

Pol. Pm not going to remain here to be insulted. 

Tim. You're goin' to stay here an' hear what I've got to 
say. Adams has been telling me things that I'd like to have 
you explain. 

Pol. Adams had better be careful. What is this fairy 
story, anyway? 

Pete. It's no fairy story. 

Tim. Adams says you tried to bribe him to play crooked 
ball the other day. 



50 A FOUL TIP / 

Pol. It's a lie. / 

Pete. It's the truth. 

Pol. It's his word against mine ', which goes, Purdy ? 

Tim. Adams' every time. 

Pol. {sneeringly). Oh, of course. 

Tim. Your word ain't cuttin' much ice with me. Pollard. 
But that ain't all. Uraliah Higgins was over to Brewster Sun- 
day, an' he got wind of some of your crooked work over there. 
You tried to hire their pitcher to put Verne and Adams out of 
the game with some of his wicked inshoots, but you 

Pol. That's another 

Tim. No, 'tain't, Pollard. 'Tain't no use to deny it. 
We've been over there, Adams an' I, an' got the whole story 
with witnesses to prove it. The Brewster boys want the cham- 
pionship, an' they want it bad, but they want to win it fair an' 
square. 

Pol. It's a cock and bull story that you and Adams have 
fixed up. 

Pete. It's true, every word. 

Tim. You look like a mighty cheap sport to me. Pollard, 
actin' so darn mean just because Mabel Remington give you 
the mitten. Nice man you'd make for a good girl. 

Pol. Nice man ! You talk about a nice man ! What sort 
of a fellow is Verne Gale? A thief, isn't he? A thief; you 
don't deny it ! 

Pete. Pollard, you've called Verne Gale a thief for the last 
time. / know who the thief is. I saw him take the money ! 

Pol. {startled^ You know — you saw — saw who? 

Tim. Yes, Adams, saw who? 

Pete. Harold Irving ! 

Pol. Harold Irving ? 

Tim. I thought so ; I thought so all the time. There, Pol- 
lard, your gun is spiked. Now you'd better keep your mouth 
shut if you want to keep out of trouble. 

Pol. That's another one of Adams' bluffs. 

Pete. It's the truth, and Verne Gale knows it. 

Tim. Guess that's right. Oh, say, Pollard, here's a co- 
nundrum for ye. Do you know what the leopard said to the 
lion when he saw Theodore Roosevelt a-comin' through the 
jungle with his gun ? 

Pol. I've no time to fool with conundrums. What's the 
answer ? 

Tim. The leopard said, " I'm goin' to beat it ; I'm spotted." 



A FOUL TIP 51 

See the point, Pollard ? Better not wait. When the boys git 
a-hold of your deviltry our police force won't be strong enough 
to protect ye. I'd advise you to pack your grip and light out 
on the first train. You're spotted ! 

Pol. If I go you'll hear from me before I get out. 

Tim. All right, but make your farewells short. {^Exit Pol.) 
Adams, you're a brick. 

(Pete comes to c.) 

Pete. Verne won't like it, but I can't help it. 

Tim. You did jest the right thing. Now keep quiet an* 
we'll have Verne out of this hole in less'n no time. 

Pete. Yes, and put Hal Irving into one. That's just what 
Verne's been trying to avoid. He had his sister to think of 
also. 

Tim. So he did ! Poor Nell ! 

Pete. It's going to be pretty hard for her, Mr. Purdy. 

Tim. We must fix it up somehow without her getting wind 
of it. 

Pete. But Pollard ? 

Enter Mab. and Nel., r., hurriedly. Mab. drops limply on 
bench. 

Mab. Oh, Mr. Purdy, have you heard? Mercy, I'm all 
out of breath. Have the boys told you? 

Tim. Told me what ? 

Mab. Nell, you tell him ; I can't. 

Nel. About the mean things Pollard tried to do over to 
Brewster. 

Tim. I heard of it. The boys don't know about it, do 
they? 

Mab. Know about it ! I should say they do. 

Nel. Yes, they're looking for Pollard now. 

Mab. And they're mad enough to do most anything to hhn 
if they find him. 

(Mab., on bench. Nel., r. c. Tim, c. Pete, l. c.) 

Tim. This looks serious. I must put on my badge. Adams, 
keep your eyes open. [^^/V, in store. 

{Noise outside ; distant shouts and cries coming nearer.) 

Nel. Listen, Mabel ! The boys are coming. 



52 A FOUL TIP 

Mab. Yes, lucky for Pollard he isn't here. 

Enter Gale, r. Cofnes to c. / 

/ 

Gale. Is Pollard here ? Tell me quick. i 

Pete. No, he left here five minutes ago. 

Gale. This is no place for you, girls ; there's going to be 
trouble. 

Mab. Oh, let me stay. (^Rises.) I want to see it if Pol- 
lard is in it. 

Gale. You litde heathen ! You must help me to keep him 
out of it. Find him if you can and tell him to make himself 
scarce for a while. 

Mab. You want me to play the good Samaritan with him ? 

Gale. I don't want the boys to disgrace themselves. 
Adams, see if you can't reason with them; tell them to act 
like men, for my sake. 

Pete. They've stood a lot already for your sake, Verne. 

(Nel. comes down c. to Gale.) 

Gale. I know, Adams, I know, but don't talk ; minutes are 
precious. Hurry, both of you. (£xgunt Fete and Mab., r.) 
Nell, sister mine. Why, Nell, you've been crying ! Tears on 
your birthday! What does this mean? (Nel. ha7ids Gale 
letter ; does not speak. Gale opens ^ turns over and reads 
signature.') From Hal ! 

Nel. He gave you some money to buy me a birthday 
present. 

Gale. Does he say so ? 

Nel. Yes, a watch. 

Gale. Well ? 

Nel. You did not get it ? 

Gale. No. 

Nel. Why, Verne, tell me why? 

Gale {hesitatifigly walks up stage ; back to r. c). Well, I — 
I thought — you see I was afraid it would displease his father. 

Nel. {crossing). Verne ! {Places hands on his shoulders 
and looks intently into his eyes.) You are keeping something 
from me. You are ; I can see it in your eyes. Oh, I know ; 
1 am not blind or stupid. The money, those marked bills — 
Hal took them, stole them — he gave them to you .' 

Gale. Hush, Nell, not so loud ! 

{Removes her hands gently and turns away.) 



A FOUL TIP 53 

Nel. You do not deny it ; you can't, Verne. 

Gale. No, Nell. 

Nel. And Hal is a thief; stole money from his father. 
Oh, it's terrible, Verne; it's almost unbelievable. 

Gale {sadly). Almost unbelievable, yes ! 

Nel. And you, Verne, for him, for me, you have borne 
Pollard's insults and Mr. Irving's abuse. 

Gale. It was the only thing to do. 

Nel. But now they must know, — everybody must know. 

Gale. Not now, Nell, not now ; wait ! 

Nel. Wait ? No, you have suffered too much already. 

Gale. What can you do? Mr. Irving wouldn't beUeve it 
if you told him. 

Nel. But the letter ? 

Gale. You wouldn't show him that. 

Nel. No, but I can show it to Uncle Tim. 

Gale. Nell, listen to me. Wait, wait till Hal comes home ! 

Nel. No, Verne, I'm going to tell Uncle Tim. 

Gale. Stop, Nell, stop ! (Nel. starts to exit in store.) 
Well, it's bound to come out. I've done my best for Hal, 
poor fellow ! 

(Tim appears at store door, pinning badge on coat.) 

Tim. There, I cal'late that'll make 'em respect the law. 

Nel. Oh, Uncle Tim, it was Hal Irving who took the 
money ! I've found out all about it ! 

Tim. An' so have I. (Comes c.) 

Gale. You, Uncle Tim ? 

Tim. Yes, your Uncle Timothy has got the thing all sim- 
mered down fine. Verne, I'm proud of ye. 

Nel. And so am I, Uncle Tim. But Hal; what about 
him? Isn't it terrible? 

Tim. Now, jest don't worry, little girl. Somehow, I have 
the feelin' that things is a-goin' to work out all right. 

Nel. How, Uncle Tim? Tell me how? 

Tim. I dunno's I c'n do that, Nell, but I feel it in my 
bones that somethin's goin' to happen. {I^ooks off.) Perhaps 
it's goin' to happen right away. Here comes Irving himself. 
Guess you'd better leave me alone with him a spell. 

Gale. Be careful, Uncle Tim. Spare Hal if you can. 

Nel. Yes, but remember Mr. Irving must know that Verne 
is innocent. 

Tim. Bless your dear heart, child ! Leave it all to your 



54 A FOUL TIP 

Uncle TiiD. And you, Verne, God bless ye, I wish — oh — I 
wish you was viy boy. 

Gale. Uncle Tim, I 

Tim. There, skeedaddle, both of you, he's coming. 

[Exeunt Nel. and Gale, l. 

Enter Irv. ; comes down r. c. 

Irv. What is the meaning of this noisy demonstration ? 
Tim. Guess I don't quite get ye, Mr. Irving. 
Irv. I met a mob of boys going toward my factory shout- 
ing like mad ; what does it mean ? 

Tim. Guess they're jest celebratin* ! Boys will be boys. 
Irv. But they kept calling Pollard's name. 

(Irv., r. c. Tim, l. c.) 

Tim. Probably want him to help 'em celebrate. He's 
something of a sport himself, so I'm told. 

Irv. He's a gentleman. 

Tim. Glad you think so; he ain't the kind we raise in the 
country, though. Goin' to start up soon, Mr. Irving? 

Irv. In a few days. 

Tim. Fire didn't cripple ye much, did it? 

Irv. No, the damage was mostly in the storehouse. 

Tim. Close call, though. 

Irv. It was, indeed. 

Tim. Mighty close call for you, too; Verne Gale saved 
your life, Mr. Irving. 

Irv. I do not forget that. I am not ungrateful, Mr. Purdy. 
Have you anything new? 

Tim. I know Verne's an innocent boy, Mr. Irving. 

Irv. You speak very confidently. 

Tim. That's because I know what I'm talking about. 

Irv. What do you mean ? Explain yourself. 

Tim. I wish I could without hurtin' your feelin's, be- 
cause 

Irv. Never mind my feelings ; say it, and say it quick. 

Tim. I — er — that is — I happen to know for a fact that your 
son Hal gave Verne that marked bill. 

Irv. My son ! You don't mean 

Tim. Oh, I don't say Hal stole it, Mr. Irving. 

Irv. Stole it. Harold steal / Why, man, you're crazy ! 



A FOUL TIP 55 

Hal had money enough. Besides, why should he be giving 
Gale money? 

Tim. I can't tell you that. 

Irv. I have a right to know. 

Tim. Ask your son. 

Irv. You know that's impossible. 

Tim. If you hadn't sent him away this thing wouldn't have 
happened. 

Irv. I sent him away for his own good. 

Tim. That's your idee of it ; but he felt that he wasn't bein' 
treated square ; an' if he did take your money, money that he 
hadn't orter took, you mustn't be too hard on him. He ain't 
the only one to blame. 

Irv. Enough, Purdy ! Why, man, you are trying to place 
the responsibility for this whole affair upon me. 

Tim. See here, Mr. Irving, men of your age an' mine is apt 
to git sorter sot an* narrer. We like to have our own way, 
an* sometimes our way ain't the best way. Now there's your 
son. He's taken a strong fancy to Nellie Gale, an* I tell you, 
Mr. Irving, a better girl never drawed breath. You don't like 
it — you 

Irv. I don't propose to let him ruin his life by throwing 
himself away upon an obscure country girl. 

Tim. No; 'tain't in accordance with your idees, so you 
send your boy away, your only child, an' he bids ye good-bye 
with bitter feelin's in his heart toward ye. If he has done 
wrong, so have you, Mr. Irving. You robbed him of his right 
to have friends an' — yes — an' love of his own choosin'. 

Irv. Stop, Purdy, you are going too far. My son's future 
is in my hands. 

Tim. No ; it's in his own hands, Mr. Irving. You put it 
there when you sent him away. Why shouldn't he choose his 
own friends? He's shown mighty good judgment. Why 
shouldn't he pick out a wife to suit himself? He's going to 
live with her, you ain't. But suppose you do? Suppose the 
time comes when you want a touch of the homefeelin', the love 
an' sympathy that sorter gits down where a man lives ? Then 
you'll be sorry that you didn't give up your sot idees an' no- 
tions, an' let your boy follow the promptin's of his own heart. 

Irv. I warn you again, Purdy ! You have no right to talk 
to me in this manner. 

Tim. I'm talkin' as one father to another, Mr. Irving. If 
I'd had some one to beat a little sense into me as I'm a-tryin' 



56 A FOUL TIP 

to do to you (with emotion) instead of a green mound over in 
the churchyard yonder, I might 'a' had a boy to-day to love 
an' be proud of an' take to my heart. 

Irv. What ! You had a son ? 

Tim. Yes; you didn't know that, did you, Mr. Irving? 
I sent him away, drove him from home because he crossed my 
will. Sent him away in hot anger, jest as you sent your boy 
away. I never saw my boy again alive, never had a chance to 
tell him that I'd made a mistake an' was sorry for it 

Irv. Don't, Purdy, don't, I beg of you ! 

Tim. It needed a blow like that to bring me to my senses. 
I've had my lesson, an' I've paid the price. Don't make the 
same mistake, Mr. Irving. Send for your boy ; send for him 
before it's too late. Git his confidence, talk things over, an* 
don't forgit you was a boy yourself once. You can't drive your 
son, he ain't that kind; he's too much like his father. (Tim 
pauses and Irv., 7vho has turned away, doesn^t reply. Tim 
holds out his hands entreatingly.) Don't have hard feelin's 
toward me, Mr. Irving. I'm a rough, blunt man, but the sor- 
rer tliat came to me made my heart sorter tender like for all 
boys that don't seem to be gittin' a square deal. 

(Irv. should indicate a struggle between his pride and better 
nature. Tim watches hivi closely. Suddenly Irv., with- 
out a word, grasps TiM'.f hand and holds it firmly, the 
other hand on TiM'-f shoulder, looks him in the eye afi in- 
stant, and exits ivithout a word. Tim watches Irv. off, 
then sits on betich, head bowed in hands.') 

Enter Nel. and Gale, l. 

Nel. {going to Tim). Oh, Uncle Tim, what is it? Was 
Mr. Irving very, very angry ? 

Tim. No, Nell ; not very angry. 

Gale. Did you tell him about the letter? 

Tim. No ; I jest talked things over with him a little. 

Nel. And he was harsh and cruel, he said things that hurt 
you? 

Tim. Why, no, Nell, I can't say's he did. I did most o' 
the talkin', an' I had to tell him some things that hurt me, that 
made me feel sorry an' sad, for a spell ; but I guess I set him 
to thinkin' ; I guess I touched him where his heart is, if he's 
got one. 

£nier Pete, r. 



A FOUL TIP 57 

(Tim on bench. Nel., r. c. Pete, c. Gale, l. c.) 

Pete. It's no use, Verne ! I can do nothing with the boys. 
Gale. Then I must try my hand at it. 
Pete. It'll do no good. If they find Pollard there's sure 
to be a mix-up. 

Tim. Then they know the whole story ? {Rises.') 
Pete. Yes, more even than you know. 
Tim. How's that ? 

{Crosses with Nel., who sits on bench.) 

Gale. Tell us all about it, Adams, everything you know. 

Pete. Well, this is the way the boys got it from King, the 
Brewsters' pitcher. It seems that Pollard has been backing 
the Brewsters for the championship. 

Gale. Ah, I thought so. 

Pete. He wants them to win out of spite against you, for 
one thing, Verne. 

Gale. Yes, he made that plain enough. 

Pete. Then when Ferd Pike's arm went back on him. Pol- 
lard thought our team was crippled sure, and he put up a lot 
more money on Brewster. He thought he saw a chance to win 
a stack of money. 

Tim. That's where he made a dum fool mistake, wasn't it, 
Adams ? 

Pete. It looks that way. Then you signed me, Verne, and 
he tried his crooked work with me. 

Gale. With you, Adams? You never told me. 

Tim. But it didn't go, did it, Adams? 

Pete. No, it didn't go; so he went over to Brewster and 
tackled King, offered to pay him his own price if he'd only put 
you and me out of the game ; cripple us. spike us, any old way. 
He told King he didn't care how he did it, so long as he put 
us out. 

Nel. (who has been listening intently to the conversation). 
The wretch ! 

{Rises and crosses — stands at Gale's right.) 

Pete. Can you blame the boys for being angry, Mr. Purdy ? 

Tim. Blame 'em ! Great Scott, I wish I wasn't a police- 
man. 

Nel. Why, Uncle Tim ! 



58 A FOUL TIP 

Tim. Wal, I do ! The idee ; an' Irving says Pollard's a 
gentleman. Huh ! 

Enter Almira. Comes c. 

Almira. Wal, of all the strange things, what do you think ? 
Hal Irving's come home ! 

Tim. What's that? Say it again ! 

Gale. Hal home ! What can it mean ! 

Nel. {taking Gale's hand^ he putting his arm around her 
ivaist). Is he really, really home, Mrs. Purdy ? 

Almira. That's what I said. 

Nel. Now we'll know; know the whole truth. I dread it, 
Verne. Oh, I dread it ! 

Gale. Hush, Nell, hush ! 

Tim. Do you know this for sure, Almiry, or is it something 
you've heard ? 

Almira. Something I've heard ? Can't I believe my own 
eyes? Wal, I guess I can! Didn't I see Hiram a-carryin' 
Hal up to Irving's, bag and baggage ? Wal, I guess I did. 
Did I hear it ? No, I saw it ! 

Nel. When, Mrs. Purdy? 

Almira. Jest now; jest as I's comin' home. I met Mr. 
Irving, an' when I told him about it he started off's if he'd 
been shot out of a gun. Where you been all the mornin', 
Verne ? 

Gale. I've not been far away. 

Almira. You're as hard to locate as a lightnin' bug. I've 
been chasin' all over the village after ye. I declare I'm all beat 
out. yExit in store. 

Gale. Things are happening fast, aren't they. Uncle Tim ? 

Tim. Yes, something's up; I dunno what; I'm glad Hal's 
home, though. 'Twon't take long now to get at the bottom of 
the whole business. 

Nel. {sadly). Yes, that's what it means. Hal's disgrace. 
Oh, Uncle Tim ! Is there no way to spare him? 

Tim. I hope so. P'raps Hal an' his father c'n fix things up 
somehow so't won't get out. 

{Noise outside, boys shouting and crying : " Oh^ wewon^t 
do a thing to Pollard / Won't we ? Wait and see.'') 

Gale. That sounds like mischief, Uncle Tim. 



A FOUL TIP 59 

{Voices outside: " What's the fnatter with Verne Gale? 
He's all right:') 

Tim. That sounds peaceable enough. 

( Voice outside : '' And Adatns, too ? ") 

Gale. We can say amen to that, can't we? 

{Voices outside : ^^ Sure, Adams, too.'' 

" Rah, rah, rah for Westvale, 
Three times three for Gale, 
We've got no use for Foliar d, 
Pete Adams is not for sale,'' 

Cheers and shrill whistles.^ 

Nel. I'm afraid, Uncle Tim. 

Almira {at store door). What in the name of sin is all this 
noise ? 

Tim. It's only the boys, Almiry. Take Nell in there with 
you. She's a little nervous. 

Almira. Come right in here, Nell. If there's any trouble 
we c'n see it an' not be in it. 

(Nel. starts in door with Almira.) 

( Voice outside : 

" Has anybody here seen Pollard? 
Has anybody here seefi Pollard, 
Pollard with the red fiecktie ? 
If we once get our hands on Pollard^ 
We'll give him a jet black eye." 

*' Hooray ! That's what f Sure thing I") 

Tim. By cricky, Verne, I guess we're in for it. 
Gale. If they come here we must lay down the law to 
• them. 

( Voices have been gradually coming nearer all through this 
dialogue. Now about to enter.) 

Pete {outside). Now, boys, here we are. Remember what 
we came for. Forget Pollard for a little while, can't you? 
Gale. That's right, Adams, reason with them. 



60 A FOUL TIP 

{No£ addressed io Pete, but to Tim.) 
{Voice outside : " We caUj but ive woiCi I ") 
Pete {outside). But remember Verne and his sister. 

(Almira and Nel. on platform.) 
Tim. Good boy, Adams, good boy ! 

(Gale and Tim, l. f.) 
{Voices outside : " That's what we came for, ^^) 

Gale. What do they mean by that? 

Pete {outside). All right ! Now, then, altogether. {Enter 
boys, R., headed by Pete. Almika and Nel. start back in 
store. Boys come down r.) Don't go, Miss Gale; we want 
you. 

Nel. {coming out timidly, holding Almira's hand). Want 
me, me ! / don't know where Pollard is ! 

Voice. That ain't it, Nellie. 

Voice. No, 'tain't that at all. 

Gale. What does this mean, Adams? What do the boys 
want ? 

Voice. Tell him, Adams. 

Voice. No, tell her. 

Tim. Pd be mightily obliged to you boys if you'd jest let 
us know the raeanin' of this gatherin'. 

Voice. Oh, brace up, Adams ! Warm up ! 

Pete. Miss Gale, the boys have asked me to do something 
for them. Something that is very hard for me to do. 

Nel. 1 don't understand. 

Voice. Oh, go on, Adams, put it right over the plate, no 
curves. 

Voice. That's right, Adams, give her a straight one. 

Pete, Be quiet, boys; I can't talk in all this noise. You 
see. Miss Gale, we boys have heard that to-day is your birth- 
day, and v/e want to make you a present. 

Nel. a present? How kind of you, how very kind of 
you, boys. 

Pete. We want to give you somelliing to remember the 
Weslvale boys by, sometliing that will remind you of their 
friendship for you and their loyalty to Verne. 1 don't know 



A FOUL TIP 6 1 

what to say. There's plenty of the boys can do this better 
than I'm doing it. 

Voice. You're out of your box, Adams ! Don't balk. 

Voice. Don't try any out curves, either. Just a straight 
away dehvery. 

Pete. All right, boys, here goes for a strike out. Miss 
Gale, here's a watch for you. We boys have bought it and 
paid for it with our own money. Take it with the best wishes 
of the Westvale ball team. 

Voices. Good, Adams ! Great ! Fine ! 

Voice. Three cheers for Nellie and Verne. 

(^Given with a will.) 

Voice. Speech, Nellie, speech ! 

Nel. Oh, boys, I can't ! I can't say anything. You are 
too good. {^Breaks down sobbi?ig.') 

Tim {wiping tears from his eyes). Verne, I guess it's up 
to you to say something. 

Gale. Boys, you've bunched your hits in great shape. It 
is such a surprise, so totally unexpected; I can't begin to ex- 
press what I want to say. Uncle Tim, say something; thank 
them for Nell, for me. (Turns away to hide emotion.) 

TiM {blowing nose vigorously). By the great horn spoon, 
boys ! Talk about strike outs 1 Adams, you're too speedy 
for me; I can't do anything with your delivery. Boys, you're 
all right! All I've got to say is, keep your heads; don't do 
anything you'll be sorry for. You know what I mean. 

All. Yes, we know. Sure, we're on all right. Leave it 
to us, etc. 

Mab. {outside). Mr. Rowell, Pollard wants you to call for 
him at the shoe factory. He's going away on the next train. 

HiRiUi {outside). All right, Miss Remington. I'll get him 
to the depot in time. 

All. Pollard, the shoe factory ! We'll see him off, Mr. 
Purdy. Don't worry ! \_Exeujit, hurriedly. 

Tim. By cricky ! Mabel's got us into a pretty mess. 

Nel. Don't blame Mabel. She didn't know the boys were 
here. 

Enter Mab., r. 

Mab. The boys are running like mad. I've put my foot 
in it this time, haven't I ? 

Gale {impatiently). You surely have. 



62 A FOUL TIP 

Mae. Now don't be cross, Verne ! 

Tim. Verne's all right. He's excited, that's all. 

Almira. An' I don't wonder. Them boys is enough to 
git anybody excited. 

Mab. I don't care, anyway. I've stood enough from Pol- 
lard ; more than you know. I hope he gets his deserts. 

Tim. He will if the boys git a- hold of him, I bet ye ! 

Enter Harold. 

Harold {rushing up to Gale, shaki?ig both hands ; Gale 
doesn't speak). Verne, old boy ! (Harold turns to Nel. ; 
holds her hands. He speaks to her and Mab.) Nellie, it's 
good to be back ; on your birthday, too. I did not forget. 

(Gale, r. Harold, r. c. Nel. c. Tim, r. c. Mab., l. c. 
Almira, l. up stage.) 

Nel. {sadly). My birthday, yes. 

Harold. Lively times, eh, Mabel? - 

Mab. {coolly). I should say so, rather ! 

Harold. Mr. Purdy, I want to 

Tim. Jest a moment, Hal. Do you know what Verne's 
been through since you went away ? 

Harold. Do I knoiv ? Well, I guess I do. That's what 
brought me home flying. I read all about it in the papers. 

Nel. About the robbery ? 

{During all of above dialogue a feeling of restraint is indi- 
cated by all but Harold.) 

Harold. Yes, the robbery and the fire. 

Nel. And about Verne ? 

Harold. Not until I got home. 

Nel. Did your father tell you ? 

Harold. Yes. Verne, you great big, noble-hearted chump ! 
Why didn't you tell where you got that money? 

Gale. How could I ? 

Tim. He couldn't say anything without throwing suspicion 
on you, don't you see? 

Gale. And besides, I gave you my promise. 

Harold. That's right ! Verne, I never dreamed I was 
going to get you into such a scrape. 

Mab. He saved your father's life, too; and risked his own 
to do it. 



A FOUL TIP 63 

Harold. Yes, I know; father has told me all about it. 
It's no use to say anything, Verne; I can't begin to tell you 
how grateful I am. 

Gale. Don't try, Hal. It's all right. 

Harold. Yes, it's all right now, glory be ! I've told father 
the whole story, about the watch and everything. 

{Takes Gale's hand?) 

Nel. {aside, to Tim). Ask him about the money. Uncle 
Tim. 

Tim {nodding to Nel. in reply). Did you tell him all about 
the money, too ? 

Harold. Why, of course I did. Great heavens! \ou 
don't think I stole it, do you? 

Mab. You gave it to Verne. What could we think ? 
Tim. And Adams saw you take it from the safe. 
Harold. You've made out a strong case against me, 
haven't you? I may as well own up. 
Tim. Then you did take it? 
Harold. Yes, I took it. 

Nel. But you didn't steal it; I know now that you didn't, 
Hal. 

Harold. I should say not ! Let me explain. 
Tim. Go ahead ! That's just what we're all waitin' for. 
Harold. Of course, you know that I sold my motor-boat, 
Verne ? 

Gale. Yes. 

Tim. What's that got to do with it ? 

Harold. Don't be impatient, Mr. Purdy. {Turns to 
Gale.) I got the money for it the day before I went away; 
one hundred and twenty-five dollars. 
Gale. You sold it dirt cheap. 

Harold. That's right, but I needed the money. Now the 
plot thickens. Listen ! That night, after I found that father 
was determined to send me West, I went back to the ofhce and 
changed two fifty-dollar bills into small bills. These, 1 am 
told, were marked ; the bills I gave you, Verne. 
Gale. The bills your fcither said were stolen ! 
Nel. And you only changed them. 
Harold. That's all. 

Gale. Shake, Hal I I couldn't believe you'd do it ! Oh, 
I'm glad it's all right ! So glad, Hal ! 



64 A FOUL TIP 

Nel. I'm too happy to talk, Hal. 

[Takes his other hand.') 

Mab. I'd like to hear Pollard call Verne a thief now. 

Harold. Has he ever done that ? 

Mab, I guess he has ; Verne's borne a lot for your sake. 

Harold. I'll punch Pollard's head for him ! 

Tim. I can't git it through my noddle about that money, 
though. If you only changed it, Hal, your father must have 
made a mistake. There wasn't any robbery? 

Harold. Yes, there was. The two fifty dollar bills were 
missing. 

Nel. Then some one did steal them after all ? 

Harold. Yes. The question is, who ? 

(Tim slaps his thigh ivitli right hand, arid scratches his 
head. ) 

Gale. What's the matter, Uncle Tim ? 

Tim. I've got an idee. I have one once in a while. 

Almira. I never knew ye to have one in your leg before. 

(Tim exits into store, followed by Almira.) 

Harold. Now, Nellie, let's see the watch. 1 hope you 
liked it. (Nel, hands watch. Harold, surprised.) Why, 
Verne, this isn't what I told you to get ! 

Gale. I didn't get it. 

Nel. The boys gave me this ; the ball team. 

Harold. But I thought, — oh, I see ! You couldn't, of 
course you couldn't do it. 

Gale. No, I gave one bill to Adams and one to Hi Rowell. 
Then the trouble began. The rest of the money is locked up 
in my desk. 

Harold. Verne, you're the whitest boy I know. Never 
mind, Nell. The boys got ahead of me on the watch but I'll 
make up for lost time. There's a pun to match some oi your 
wretched ones, Verne. 

Gale. It isn't so bad, at that. What are you going to do 
now? 

Harold. I'm going to buy Nellie a ring. 

Nel. a ring? 

Hauolh. Yes, a ring, and it's going to have a spark in it 
:is bright as your eyes are this minute. 



A FOUL TIP 



65 



Nel. Don't joke, Hal ! You can't get a ring ; your 

father . ^ , 

Harold. Now just leave it to me to manage Dad. 

Mab. I guess you don't realize how harsh and cruel your 
father has been to Verne and Nell. 

Nel. Don't speak of it, Mabel, I beg of you. 

Mab Oh, it's all right for you to talk. Haven t I got 
some feelings? Do you suppose I've been havmg a picnic 
while Verne's been called all sorts of mean thmgs by Mr. 
Irving and Pollard ? ,^ , , a jt.h ^„ 

Harold. Of course you haven't, Mabel. And I tell you 
right now that father and Pollard have got to square themselves 
with the whole bunch and that goes. {^Confusion outside.) 
What's broke loose now ? 

(Harold and Gale walk up r. c. and down l. Boys enter 
R with Pol. seated on a tiarrow board on tvhich hts suit- 
case is also hung. A boy on either side steadies Vol.. by 
his shoulders. Tim and Almira appear at door.) 

Tim. What's a-goin' on here, boys ? c ^ 1, 

Pol. Mr. Purdy, I demand your protection, bend these 

boys av/ay. ^ a >. 

Voice. We're only taking him down to the depot. 

(Boys, r. Tim, c. Gale, Mab., Nel., and Harold 

grouped at h.^ 
Voice. Thought you'd like to say good-bye, Mr. Purdy. 
Voice. Yes, and Pollard wants to shake a day-day to the 
ladies. 

(^JDuring these speeches the boys bounce Pol. up and down 

on the board roughly.) 
Tim. I'm an officer of the law, boys ; be careful what you 

Pol. As an officer then, I demand protection, Purdy. ^ 

Tim Pollard, you don't seem to be enjoym' yourself, that s 
a fact ; but I guess you're gettin' about what you deserve. 
You didn't git away quick enough. 

Voice. Yes, he's going now, all right, leave it to us. 

Tim Just a minute there, boys. Pollard, before you go 1 
want that money you stole from Mr. Irving' s safe. 

Pol. I haven't— I— I didn't take it ! 



66 A FOUL TIP 

Tim {sternly). Come, fork it over ! No bluffs. Where 
are those bills 1 saw in your pocketbook t'other day ? 

Harold. You, Pollard? 

Gale. You don't mean, Uncle Tim ? 

Mab. Yes, he does. See how white Pollard is. 

Voices. Soak him, boys ! Yes, he tried to lay it on to 
Verne. {The boys crowd around Yoi.. threateningly.') 

Gale. Steady, boys ! Let Uncle Tim manage him. 

Voice. We're going to have a hand in it, too. 

{They shake Pol. up again.) 

Pol. Don't, boys, don't ! Make them stop, Purdy. 

Tim. Then give up the money, quick. I won't answer for 
the boys if you don't. 

Pol. Here take it ! {Takes pocketbook and throws it 
down.) The game is up ; now let me go. 

Tim. What do you say, Hal ? What shall we do with him ? 

{^Opens book, takes out bills, hands book back to Pol.) 

Enter Irv., r. 

Harold. I've no use for him ; ask father. 

(Boys, r. Irv. and Tim, c. Mab., Gale, Nel. and 
Harold grouped at l. Almira on store platform. 

Irv. What does this outrage mean ? Purdy, do you per- 
mit this? 

Tim. Wal, I ain't very enthusiastic about stoppin' it. 

Harold. There's your thief, father. {Points to Pol.) 

Tim. An' there's your money. {Ha?ids bills to Irv.) 
Now what're you goin' to do with Pollard ? 

Irv. Do you mean to tell me that Pollard stole my money ? 

Tim. Sure thing. 

Irv. Pollard, what have you to say ? 

Pol. {surlily). Nothing. 

Irv. So you do not deny it ? Pollard, I took you for a 
gentleman, treated you like one; and all the time you've been 
stealing from me. More than that, Pollard, you've tried to 
disgrace an innocent boy and made me act like a brute to 
Verne Gale and his sister. You've even allowed my own 
son's name to come under suspicion. You are a cur and a 
coward. Boys, take him away. {Turns back on Pol.) 



A FOUL TIP ^7 

Tim. You've got your money ; are you going to prosecute ? 

Tim T^lien git out, Pollard ! Take him down to the depot, 
boys, an' for goodness' sake don't miss the express. 

(Boys exit with Pol. noisily; Mab., Gale and Tim cross 
stage, ivatch them off and come down R. Just as the boys 
start off Hiram enters, r.) 

Hiram Here, where in thunder air you goin' with my 
passenger ? {Boys exit laughing.) Now that ain't fair ; Pol- 
lard hired me. There's a quarter gone to glory. ^ 

Tim. Never mind, Hi ; it's worth a quarter to git rid o. 

^^ Hiram T'hadn't ought to come out of my pocket, though. 
Almira. Oh, shucks. Hi ! You can't lose what you never 

'^TiM Mr. Irving, don't you think now after all's said an' 
done that Verne an' Nell an' I have handled this thing pretty 

'^''irv. Indeed you have. Verne, my boy, forgive me if you 
can (Crosses and takes Gale's hand.) 

Gale. With all my heart, Mr. Irving. 

IRV. And you. Miss Gale— Nellie {Holds out both 

hands.) Have you no word for me? 

Nel. (crossing over and taking hts hands\ Yes, i\ir 
Irving, I can overlook everything now that Verne s good 
name is cleared of suspicion and Hal is— is home — - 

iRV Nellie, I've been harsh and cruel. It was because i 
wanted to have my own way ; but Uncle Tim has taught me a 
lesson. Now I'm going to let Hal have his way. 

Nel. Oh, Mr. Irving ! You don't mean— you can t mean 

that Hal can . , .. ^^^ 

Harold. Yes, he does, Nell ! Hooray, yes he does (Ikv. 
holds out his arms and Nel. rushes into ^^^^^^M^ /^^;^;;| 
welcome. Harold looks on approvingly.) There Dad, break 
away ! I figure in on this myself. {Kisses Nel.) 

Almira (/. Hiram). They're makin' love right under our 

noses. Hi ! , • j 

Hiram. I don't care. I've been vaccinated. ^ 

iRV ( ^oin^ to C. of stage with TiM ; putting arm on his 

shoulder). Uncle Tim, I can sit at your feet and learn 



T 19 1912 

68 A FOUL TIP 

wisdom. Why, it's positively refreshing to be able to make 
people happy. 

Tim [hearlily). Wal, I guess it is. It's the only thing 
worlh while. I don't know of anything that pays bigger 
dividends. 

{Engine whistle heard.) 

Mab. There goes Pollard ; our troubles are over. 

(Gale«;/^/Mab., R. c. Tim^w^Irv., c. Nel. rt;;/^ Harold, 
L. c. Almira and Hiram on platform.) 



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males, five females. Costumes, modern; scenery, all interiors. 
Plays a full evening. 

THF PROF! IPATF Playin Four Acts. Seven males, five 
I IlLi 1 1\V/1 ijlVl/\ 1 Li females. Scenery, three interiors, rather 
elaborate ; costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. 

THF ^PHnni MKTRFQQ Farce in Three Acts. Nine males, 
inr. i3V..nULFL.lUlk31I\ILJO seven females. Costumes, mod- 
ern; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. 

THE SECOND MRS. TANQUERAY l!»L"IS.^S?e 

females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, three interiors. Plays a 
full evening. 

QWFFT I AVFAiriFR Comedy in Three Acts. Seven males, 
OllLiLii. Li/\YLillLr£iIV four females. Scene, a single interior, 
costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. 

THF THITNnFRRniT Comedy in Four Acts. Ten males, 
Illi:i inUili/i:.IVOWLil nine females. Scenery, three interi- 
ors; costumes, modern. Plays a full evening. 

THF TIMF^ Comedy in Four Acts. Six males, seven females. 
* **l-« * llTlEiiJ Scene, a single interior ; costumes, modern. Plays 
a full evening. 

THF WFAl^FR ^FY Comedy in Three Acts. Eight males, 
1 ri£i Tf EiAIVlJlV OCiA. eight females. Costumes, modern ; 
scenery, two interiors. Plays a full evening. 

A WIFE WITHOUT A SMILE ?°T,?/aiS,f?JrlLt?:':. 

Costumes, modern ; scene, a single interior. Plays a full evening. 



Sent prepaid on receipt of price by 

l^alter ^. pafeer Sc Companp 

No. 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts 



J-mRARY OF CONGRESS 

016 102 159 3 ^ 



ISitttnt popular ^la^s 



THF AWAlfFNINfi ^^^y "^ ^^"^' ^^*-^- ^y ^- ^- chambers. 

illlw ATT AHLlilliU Jour males, six females. Sceuery, not ditti- 
cult, clii*^fly interiors ; costumes, moderu. Plays a full evening. 
Price, 50 Cents. 

TIE FRIITS OF ENLIGHTENMENT S.T-/oi!coT" t.^,;-,';: 

one males, eleven females. Scenery, cl iracteristic Interiors ; cos- 
tumes, modern. Plays a full eveni g. .tecommended for reading 
clubs. Price, 35 Cents. 

HIS EXCELLENCY THE GOVERNCR ^'ITh™':,'^." "^t^E 

males, three females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, one interior. 
Acting rights reserved. Time, a full evening. Price, 50 Cents. 

AN[ inP4l HII^RAWn Comedy in Four Acts. By OSCAK WiLDE. 
J\l^ WLALt ULJUAni; Nine males, six females. Costumes, mod- 
ern ; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full evening. Acting rights 
reserved. Sold for reading. Price, 50 Cents. 

THE IMPORTANCE OF BEING EARNEST Hit i'^. SJi^ 

Wilde. Five males, four females. Costumes, modern ; scenes, two 
interiors and an exterior. Plays a full evening. Acting rights re- 
served. Price, 50 Cents. 

LADY WINDERMERE'S FAN '^Z^'''i^^^^^IS^il 

males. Costumes, modern ; scenery, three interiors. Plays a full 
evening. Acting rights reserved. Price, 50 Cents. 

NATHAN HAI F ^^^y '" ^^"^' ''^^*^- ^y Clyde Fitch. Fifteen 
ililiUiiii UALtLi males, four females. Costumes of the eighteenth 
century in America. Scenery, four interiors and two exteriors. Act- 
ing rights reserved. Plays a full evening. Price, 50 Cents. 

THF HTHFR FFTIHW Comedy in Three Acts. ByM. B. Horne. 
lilLi IFlllLili lL.lvL(VTT gix males, four females. Scenery, two 
interiors ; costumes, modern. Professional stage rights reserved. 
Plays a full evening. Price, 50 Cents. 

THE TYRANNY OF TEARS ^^S^JS.:^r^..,Z'^t 

males. Sceuery, an interior and an exterior ; costumes, modern. 
Acting rights reserved. Plays a full evening. Price, 50 Cents. 

A WOMAN OF NO IMPORTANCE gS,"iW.„'L°T:.g1;^^;,i?^; 

seven females. Costumes, modern ; scenery, three interiors and an 
exterior. Plays a full evening. Stage rights reserved. Offered for 
reading only. Price, 50 Cents. 



Sent prepaid on receipt of price by 

5^alter 1$. I3a6er & Company 

No. 5 Hamilton Place, Boston, Massachusetts 

S. J. PARKHILL A, CO., PRINTERS, BOSTON. 



